Internet Inquiry Sparks Journey Across Atlantic and Into the Past

Some find love on the Internet, others use it to discover adventure. Ralph Kalmanson of Santa Ana sat in front of his computer to dig more than 50 years into his past. What he discovered sent him halfway around the world, to a place he’d never forgotten. And to people who well remembered him too.

This remarkable journey began when Kalmanson, now 79, bought himself a computer a little more than a year ago and tried his hand at the Internet. He punched in the names “Peer, Belgium” and “Van de Weyer” in a message group, with no expectations it would produce anything. This was new territory to him.

But Elly Mathuvis in Cornwall, N.Y., saw his message and e-mailed him: She was a native of Belgium, and she had an elderly aunt who still lived in Peer. Perhaps her aunt would know the Van de Weyers.

The aunt eventually sent a reply: Know them? Why, Mia lives right across the street from me. Kalmanson got excited. He’d known Mia when she was just a child. There were six Van de Weyer children. He pictured them as they had been five decades ago. . . .

Kalmanson was in his early 20s and single when, like so many of his age, he was thrust into World War II. His duties with the U.S. Army Signal Corps eventually got him assigned to a British Army unit. That led him to the small village of Peer, where soldiers were billeted with local families as they waited to advance on Germany.

For six months in 1945, Kalmanson stayed with Prosper and Douka Van de Weyer and their large family. Mia was 12, Chrislane just a toddler. There were four boys: Theo was 9, Jeff 15, Pierre 17, and Rene, the one Kalmanson was closest to, was 14.

“I spoke a little French, a little German, and I knew some Latin,” Kalmanson said. “The family spoke Flemish, which was close to German. Rene knew a little English. With Rene’s help, I was pretty much able to communicate with the rest of the family.”

Kalmanson, so far from his own home, was readily accepted by all of them. “I’m Jewish,” Kalmanson said, “but they wanted to convert me to Catholicism. It was the best gift they could give me, that they wanted me to share their faith.”

Kalmanson’s unit did move on to Germany. After the war, he got married and eventually went into a family furniture business. He and his wife, Frances, had two daughters, Susan and Wendy, and spent many of their holidays traveling the world.

But none of their stops included Belgium. Kalmanson’s explanation was most reasonable: You raise a family and deal with the day to day of life. There just isn’t time to connect to the past, even though you never forget.

Two years ago, Kalmanson’s wife died. Kalmanson, perhaps in part to help occupy his time, eventually became interested in computers and how they could open up new avenues of information to him. That’s when he punched in those names.

It was last fall when Mia finally learned he was trying to find her family. She got in touch with her brother Rene, who wrote to Kalmanson. They had thought of him often over the years, Rene said. The entire family would be honored if he’d return to Peer for a reunion.

“Next thing I know, I’m on that plane and I’m flying to Belgium,” Kalmanson said. “They’ve all got children, grandchildren now. They all wanted a part of me, dinner at one house, then another. It was just fantastic.”

Three of the oldest children he’d known met his plane in Brussels. Once back in Peer, they gave him the same room he had slept in as a GI, on the second floor above the family’s clothing store. The bed was even in the same location.

The streets of Peer are still cobblestone, the same as when Kalmanson lived there. He walked the town and saw how little it had changed after half a century.

“About the only difference was now you see cars,” he said. “With gas rationing during the war, you didn’t see any vehicles in Peer.”

There was also heat. The upstairs had no heat in winter when Kalmanson lived there. He slept in his Army helmet liner to help keep him warm. But what the Van de Weyers lacked in such basics they made up with the warmth of their spirit.

Kalmanson’s only sadness was that his wife had not lived to share this moment with him, and that the Van de Weyer parents were also deceased. On this recent trip, Kalmanson recited the 23rd Psalm over their graves. (“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. . . .) I asked Kalmanson if the trip was all he had hoped it would be. He replied:

“I’ve been to the Great Wall of China. I’ve seen the great cathedrals of the world. I’ve been on top of the glacier mountains in Canada where it’s so pristine you think you’re talking to God. But nothing can compare with the high I got from that trip back to Peer, back to my adopted family.”

At Christmas he sent the family $500 to divide. Gifts would have cost them an import tax. Rene wrote back how touched the family was. And how glad they were to have Ralph Kalmanson back in their lives again.

A Lad’s Impressions: I called Rene Van de Weyer in Belgium to ask him about that reunion. The family’s strong feelings for their American visitor were evident.

“We had six soldiers stay with our family at different times during the war,” he said. “Ralph is the only one who ever came back. We are all so delighted.”

Kalmanson remembers a family accepting him. Rene Van de Weyer, now 66, remembers a GI taking time to talk with a teenage boy.

“We’d have long, long discussions, about religion, education, our cultures,” Van de Weyer told me. “We were all fascinated by America. I can still remember Ralph explaining television, and my father insisting it was not possible.”

Rene Van de Weyer has never been to America. Renewing his friendship with Kalmanson has made him even more determined to make it here.

Wrap-Up: Next time I think about sending a card to someone, but set the thought aside when life gets too busy, I hope to remember Wendy Wald of Cerritos.

When Wald sat down to write a note to her father, Ralph Kalmanson, wishing him well on his recent Belgium trip, I’m sure she had no idea what a treasure her words would become. Kalmanson had to stand back when he handed it to me. Just being close to her card brought him to tears.

She wrote, in part: “As you leave on your dream return visit to Belgium, I want you to know how very proud of you Jerry [her husband] and I are. We love you and hope this trip lives up to your expectations. Relax and enjoy yourself. . . . You’re quite a man.”

Kalmanson showed me many pictures and letters from his trip. None of them meant as much to him as his daughter’s card. What a reminder of how little effort it takes to bring joy to someone else.

Jerry Hicks’ column appears Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Readers may reach Hicks by calling the Times Orange County Edition at (714) 966-7823 or by fax to (714) 966-7711, or e-mail tojerry.hicks@latimes.com