Holy toe lead!After hearing a radio ad...

Holy toe lead!

After hearing a radio ad for the California Christian Karate School, Phil Proctor of Beverly Hills asks: “Is this the school where they teach you to turn--and kick--the other cheek?”

AND IF ANY TEETH GET KICKED OUT. . . . Stan Kelton of Lakewood spotted a sign for a dentist who seems born to the job.

UN-RAPID TRANSIT MILESTONE: It was a year ago that the Sinai and Olivet cable cars resumed their 60-second journeys up and down Bunker Hill on Angels Flight, marking a return of one of L.A.’s most beloved landmarks. Sure, the price for a one-way trip between Hill Street and Grand Avenue has increased to a whopping 25 cents, but here are 10 reasons to fly Angels Flight:

1. Great on-time arrival record.

2. All flights nonstop.

3. No limit to carry-on baggage.

4. No recirculated air in the door-less cars.

5. No need for directions on how to unfasten overhead oxygen masks.

6. L.A. doesn’t have many 96-year-old landmarks.

7. You can make a round trip on your coffee break.

8. How many rail systems brag that they’re the “world’s shortest”?

9. Have you checked Disneyland’s prices lately?

And, finally:

10. The adjacent stairway up the hill is 189 steps long.

DID ANYONE GET THE NUMBER OF THAT DOG? Out for a walk, Hawthorne resident Vickie Martin tied her boxer, Kirby, to a pole while she ducked inside a shop. Minutes later, someone asked, “Was that your dog tied to the pole?” Kirby was racing down the street, having chewed through the leash.

A bicyclist volunteered to help. Martin started running as well. To her surprise, she soon passed Kirby, who was now running in the other direction. Next the bicyclist flew by her. Later she heard sirens but didn’t make a connection.

After several minutes, the bicyclist reappeared and agreed to take her to Kirby for $5. (Hey, everyone’s time is valuable.) She agreed. They went to a dog pound where she found the fugitive, his paws a bit bloody, but otherwise OK.

It turned out that Kirby, after vanishing, had taken a jaunt on the San Diego Freeway, ran himself to exhaustion and collapsed. A passing motorist dialed 911, reporting a body on the freeway. Hence, the sirens. The authorities then transported Kirby to the pound. Bad Kirby.

DO THE POOCHES COME WITH A GUARANTEE? We’ve heard of dogs that like to chase cars, but John and Cherie Wescott of Toluca Lake found an ad for a couple of hounds that appear to be part automobile.

miscelLAny:

We received a press release for “the first annual International Graffiti Art Festival,” scheduled for July 4 in Hollywood. We doubt we’ll attend, though, inasmuch as the city has been the involuntary host of an outdoor graffiti festival every day of the year for a couple of decades now.