Heresy! Pulling for Flight Attendant Over Rev. Schuller

Having once been suspected by a United Airlines flight attendant of being the Unabomber and then being shunted off to a crummy middle seat for a four-hour flight, I know how annoying those friendly folks can get. Flight attendants complain that passengers give them a bad time. My advice: Flight attendant, heal thyself.

So, it was with a skeptical smirk that I read the first reports about the Rev. Robert Schuller’s recent run-in with a United attendant. Schuller, Orange County’s answer to Billy Graham and a veritable institution for his “Hour of Power” broadcasts from the Crystal Cathedral, was en route to Betty Shabazz’s funeral last weekend when the alleged fracas occurred.

At this point, everything is allegation and denial. The attendant, an unidentified 35-year-old man, says Schuller got physical with him in an aisle, capping ill will between the two that began when the attendant wouldn’t let Schuller hang his reverend’s robe in a closet. The attendant reportedly is now on medical leave and says he was injured in the scuffle. Nonsense, Schuller says, adding that whatever contact there was amounted to him perhaps grabbing the man’s shoulders in an attempt to make peace.

Every logical impulse told me Schuller’s version is the accurate one. And then, I watched a videotape of his press conference at Crystal Cathedral.

I suddenly found myself privately pulling for the flight attendant.

Confession: I’m not a big Robert Schuller fan. He was pleasant several years ago during the only interview I ever had with him, but there’s just something about him that bugs me.

The press conference did nothing to change my opinion.

Manipulative. Excessive. Disingenuous.

Those were some of the words that sprang to mind after watching the 30 minutes from Crystal Cathedral, which largely featured Schuller attorney Terry Giles on a phone hookup from Chicago sounding, in his invisibility, like a voice from above.

Giles suggested the attendant was looking for his 15 minutes of fame. He’s probably hoping for a book contract or a tidy sum from a lawsuit settlement, Giles suggested. Not content with that, Giles said he doesn’t know anything about the attendant, “but I’m going to know a lot more about him in the future.” Dum-da-dum-dum.

I grow ever more cynical when holy men let hatchet men do their bidding, even legal hatchet men. Was it beyond Schuller’s power to tell Giles, “Hey, look, it’s no big deal. Let’s not go after this guy. Let’s turn the other cheek.”

He didn’t. Instead, Schuller stood in the sanctuary looking as beatific as possible while his attorney verbally eviscerated the flight attendant. Maybe the good reverend thinks that as long as he doesn’t say the words, his hands are clean.

The oddity is that Giles is correct in saying most people would be suspicious of the attendant’s claim. After all, Schuller is 70 years old and widely admired. Given that, why not see if the whole incident just disappears?

*

The decision was to have a press conference. At that, it lacked style and credibility. Giles took pains to say most lawyers wouldn’t let their clients say anything. “But this is not my advice for Dr. Schuller,” Giles said.

But, when one of the first media questions for Schuller called for his depiction of what happened, he responded: “I think Terry has answered that very well, thank you.”

When someone then asked why he thought the attendant would lie, Giles intervened before Schuller could answer. Even when the reporter said he would really prefer that Schuller answer, Giles insisted on responding: “The truth is that where Dr. Schuller sees halos, I see horns,” Giles said. “The truth is, Dr. Schuller sees no bad in anyone. He is totally perplexed, so he can’t answer your question. He doesn’t know why this man would say that. It’s not in Dr. Schuller’s makeup to think of people as being greedy or lying, but I make my living in a very different way than Dr. Schuller, and I see that happening all the time.”

So much for unleashing his client.

Aside from saying he was “shell-shocked,” Dr. Schuller didn’t sound angry or wounded. Instead, he invoked his traditional feel-good attitude about life.

Meanwhile, he let his attorney practically threaten to rip the guts out of this flight attendant.

Legally, you’d think this would be a simple case. Couldn’t other passengers verify what happened on that flight?

My guess would be a clash ensued between two people used to controlling their environments. Each pushed the other’s buttons, and something had to give.

Terry Giles, speaking through Schuller, said what happened was no big deal.

I’ll buy that. But one thorny follow-up question, sir:

Why are you making it one?

Dana Parsons’ column appears Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Readers may reach Parsons by writing to him at the Times Orange County Edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, CA 92626, or calling (714) 966-7821.