Get Me to the Sig-Alert on Time

It was a true L.A. marriage when KFI-AM’s Phil Hendrie and Maria Sanchez were wed on the air in a ceremony performed by radio colleague Bill Handel.

After they said their “I do’s,” Handel promptly asked for guidance from above--from a reporter in the sky.

Said Handel:

“And, now, Mike Nolan for a traffic break.”

MAKE THAT 100 DALMATIANS: Turning to the world of pets, Richard Jones of North Hollywood found an ad that could be disturbing to both two- and four-footed creatures. And, in Pasadena, some wise guy took a bit too much off the top (see photos).

TO LIVE AND PARK IN L.A.: It was, says Laurel Hall of Whittier, a classic “territorial battle.” A woman stationed herself off the curb in a Pasadena street, guarding a parking place near a flea market.

“Cars whipped up close, aiming to zip in and grab themselves a space,” Hall said, but the woman “fended them off, waving her arms and declaring her intentions in a loud and confident voice.”

Finally, she met her match. A driver approached, made a couple of feints, then stubbornly started to back in as he shouted behind his closed window. The woman, obviously ready to die for the spot, held her ground.

Was she near-sighted? Was it a car she didn’t recognize?

The drama ended when the furious driver rolled down his window and screamed, “Mother! Get the [expletive] out of the street so I can park the damn car!”

IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THEIR LEGS: The headline over two unrelated Hermosa Beach stories in the Beach Reporter almost suggested a cause-and-effect situation: “Pier to close after dark; police may wear shorts.”

LIVELY READING: For drowsy, rush-hour commuters moving on freeways at the speed of Sojourner--2 feet per minute--there are few sights more stimulating than a hearse. (Unless it’s a cosmetic surgery billboard.)

Hearses with vanity plates are especially diverting. Laura Franklin recently saw a funeral wagon that said K DAVER while Gordon Yee spotted UNHOLY1. Others that we have come across in this grisly genre include LIVNEND, IMORBID, SCARYGY and LASTRID.

SOUNDS LIKE A BOB HOPE ROUTINE: Fred Miller of Harbor City noticed that The Times’ weather page reported the other day that tropical storm Bob was forming in the Atlantic while tropical storm Dolores was brewing in the Pacific.

STRAIGHT FROM THE COLUMNIST’S MOUTH: After TV Guide published its “100 Greatest TV Episodes of All Time,” Nick at Nite broadcast No. 73, a “Mr. Ed” show in which the Dodgers embark on a winning streak after manager Leo Durocher gets some advice over the phone from the talkative horse.

And guess what? Linda Wilson of San Diego points out that, following the episode, the real-life Dodgers immediately caught fire, winning six straight games before the All-Star break. And they’re still playing well.

Can the team win the pennant? Hey! We don’t want to hear you say, “Neigh.”

miscelLAny:

Louis Hirsch of West L.A. saw a sign on a Rancho Mirage restaurant that said, “Closed for the Summer.” Nothing unusual about that except the eatery is named The Beach House.

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Steve Harvey is open for business by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.