Even Alley Can’t Give ‘Toothless’ Bite

In the TV movie “Toothless,” Kirstie Alley plays a deceased dentist doing penance for her misspent life by serving time as the tooth fairy.

The real question is: What did Alley do to deserve such a gummy mess?

Not even the free-spirited, comedic appeal of the “Veronica’s Closet” star can save this hollow tale of redemption--the first original production in ABC’s new “Wonderful World of Disney” series (it opened last week with “Toy Story”).

Alley portrays Dr. Katherine Lewis, sent via a fatal accident to a trailer park called Limbo Land, and she’s funny as she grumbles and whines over being appointed tooth fairy--big dress, wand, tiara and all. She goes along with it because her fate hangs in the balance: either a one-way “Hellevator” ride or the stairway to Heaven.

But when Dr. Lewis flits to Earth on syrupy tooth fairy business--in awful, musical flying scenes--things go downhill fast.

Breaking Limbo rules, she befriends motherless Bobby (a painfully serious Ross Malinger) and his friends, giving Bobby advice, tucking him in and serving others as fitness coach and academic tutor. These aren’t little tykes, mind you, but 12-year-olds who are “innocent” because they haven’t lost all their baby teeth.

Soon, however, most of the “innocents” at school are pulling or punching out teeth in order to keep the tooth fairy around--and the silver coins she dispenses.

Parents, who can’t see her, blame Bobby. Will Dr. Lewis risk her place in heaven to protect him? Will she get a second chance to find love--with Bobby’s hunky dad (Dale Midkiff)? The answers in Mark S. Kaufman’s one-dimensional script, directed by Melanie Mayron, are never in doubt.

* “Toothless” airs on “The Wonderful World of Disney” Sunday at 7 p.m. on ABC (Channels 7 and 3). The network has rated it TV-G (suitable for all viewers).