Texas Camp Gives Teen Mothers Help and Hope

Finding out she was pregnant was the scariest moment of her life, all 14 years of it.

How would she care for her little girl? Could she really do it? Would her baby be better off with adoptive parents?

Her questions were answered and her fears calmed after a weeklong session at “Teen Mom Camp.”

Held in the hot dusty backwoods of West Texas, the gathering at Camp Booth Oaks, about 20 miles south of Sweetwater, has been helping young mothers for nine years. The 14-year-old was among the latest group who learned how to calm their babies before bedtime, how to make diapers when they can’t afford to buy them, and how to set a balanced meal plan.

“Sometimes life just keeps backing you down, backing you down until you feel you just can’t get a grip anymore,” said camp director Pam “Dusty” Caudill. “This camp is about giving teen moms a fighting chance.”

Although teen pregnancy rates are dropping across the state and nation, the trend is reversed in West Texas.

Most camp attendees come from the region because they’re most likely to have heard about it. Camp representatives speak in schools and to youth groups throughout the region, though all girls are welcome.

Rearing a child can be very expensive, but attending the camp is free. The Girl Scouts of America provides the campsite and pays for all meals. Staffers are volunteers, and grants from the state cover all other costs.

Between 10 and 20 new moms attended each of this year’s two sessions, both in June.

As always, Caudill opened each with a meeting about goal-setting, then began assessing potential attitude problems.

“Some of these girls are tough, really tough,” said Caudill, who is in her 22nd year of working with young mothers. “Many of them are skeptical and think they’re going to be judged.”

Some campers are pregnant; others have had their babies. The camp provides day care for those children while their mothers go through a week of rigorous courses with a goal of building self-esteem and learning the ABCs of child care.

“No one had ever told me about what to feed my baby,” said the slender 14-year-old, whose childlike face, with dark brown hair and stark brown eyes, belies the fact that she is already a mother.

“I never knew it was so complicated. I’ve already seen my baby start to change; she’s a lot more happy.”

Caudill said the often overwhelming task of parenting becomes less daunting once the teens understand the basics.

“We try not to make it just like school, but basically we meet and they sit and listen and ask questions when they have them,” Caudill said. “It doesn’t take long before they realize that listening will help them with their everyday life. No one likes to sit up with a crying baby all night.”

Every year, there are mothers who refuse to stick with the program. This year, two dropped out after the first day.

“That is disappointing,” Caudill said. “But calling you back, giving you the courage to get out of bed every morning, is the fact that there are other girls who need you.”

Those who stay face many trials during the week, including dealing with their own pasts.

“These girls have been left by men who told them they would never leave and have been subjected to a lot of small-town meanness,” Caudill said. “It’s not like the big city where you can be anonymous. In a small town, everyone knows who is pregnant. There have been all-night rap sessions where we just talk things through.

“You give your all for these girls. When they hurt, you hurt; when they cry, you cry. It doesn’t take long for everyone to let down their defenses and embrace the fact that we care about them. That’s one of the hardest things for them to accept--that we care about them.”

Former camper Marissa Molina said she remembers giving instructors a hard time at the start.

“I expected it to be just a lot of fun, but the first day it was hot and people started getting aggravated with each other,” she said. “But after that it settled down and I just started seeing the benefit from it and started to understand what it was leading up to.”

Caudill said many young mothers come in with a “thick layer of attitude.” That can be trying for instructors.

But, Caudill added, “Sometimes we end up appealing to that tough, independent attitude to get them to listen. They know that in many ways they’re helpless, and they don’t like it. These are girls that could’ve gotten abortions, but they wanted to keep their children. They’re fighters, and most of them bring a commitment that’s stronger than they realize.”

Caudill said the biggest reward is hearing from girls who have attended the camp that they have found jobs, husbands and happiness.

“You can see the renewed determination in their eyes,” Caudill said. “If nothing else, they left here knowing that they can be a good mother if they worked hard.”