Farris Discovers a Real Beef With Southland Weather

It’s as predictable as the swallows returning to Capistrano.

On Jan. 1 each year, hundreds, maybe thousands, of Midwesterners shovel snow from their driveways, retreat into their houses to watch the Rose Bowl game, see the sun rays reflecting off the San Gabriel Mountains and call for moving vans.

This year, we might not have to wait until New Year’s Day for the migration to begin.

Consider: Sunday, when the temperature dropped to 28 in Madison, Wis., home to the Wisconsin Badgers, UCLA offensive tackle Kris Farris almost passed out from heat exhaustion during a practice in Westwood.

The wind-chill factor hovered around 72.

“It was scary,” Farris said Sunday night at Lawry’s in Beverly Hills. “I had trouble breathing and was hyperventilating.”

Trainers recommended an IV.

But all Farris, who was attracted to UCLA because of its film school and, naturally, wants to direct, needed was The Waterboy.

“I drank some water, took a cold shower and felt fine,” he said.

UCLA Coach Bob Toledo was surprised Farris made it to the restaurant for the annual Beef Bowl. The 6-foot-9, 315-pound Outland Trophy winner said he wouldn’t miss it, although he was still feeling lightheaded and managed to eat only 5 1/2 prime ribs.

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After watching films of the Bruins’ Rose Bowl opponent, Toledo said he is most concerned about Wisconsin’s size. . . .

With tailback Ron Dayne (253 pounds) as the caboose behind fullback Cecil Martin (232) and right guard Aaron Gibson (368), that is no light rail train. . . .

“They eat a lot more beef than we do,” Toledo said. . . .

That’s official. The Badgers won the Beef Bowl, 254 pounds to 247. . . .

The victory should have been more convincing, but Gibson finished only four prime ribs. He must have eaten before going to Lawry’s. . . .

For Christmas, Toledo said he and his wife bought a new house. . . .

Good news for Bruin fans: It’s not in San Diego, Seattle, Baltimore, Philadelphia, Chicago, Charlotte or any other NFL city seeking a new head coach. . . .

The three coaches considered architects of Dallas’ first two Super Bowl wins in the ‘90s were Jimmy Johnson, defensive coordinator Dave Wannstedt and offensive coordinator Norv Turner. . . .

Now Wannstedt is out in Chicago, Turner appears unlikely to gain the two-thirds majority required in the Senate to keep his job in Washington and Johnson has proven less than a genius in Miami. . . .

Maybe it was the Cowboy players who won all those games. What a novel concept. . . .

Our first clue should have been when they won a Super Bowl ring for Barry Switzer. . . .

The luckiest team in the NFL playoffs? The Cowboys, 8-0 against NFC East teams and 2-6 against the rest, open against an NFC East team, Arizona. . . .

The unluckiest team in the NFL playoffs? If they win at San Francisco on Sunday, Green Bay probably would also have to win at Minnesota and Atlanta to reach the Super Bowl for the third consecutive season. None of those three teams has lost at home this season. . . .

The most intriguing Super Bowl matchup would be Denver versus Atlanta. Let John Elway and Dan Reeves finally settle their differences on the field. . . .

Why waste a first-round draft choice on a running back? Terrell Davis was selected in the sixth round (196th) in 1995, Jamal Anderson in the seventh round (201st) in 1994. . . .

Because only the best officials work the playoffs, I’m guessing we’ve seen the last of Phil Luckett and his crew this season. . . .

Wisconsin fans here for the Rose Bowl, or anyone for that matter, might want to catch two exhibits of sports photography at the Fahey/Klein Gallery on La Brea Avenue. . . .

One features the work of Sports Illustrated’s Walter Iooss, the other a group of photographers that includes Los Angeles’ Howard Bingham. He has been Muhammad Ali’s favorite photographer for almost 40 years. . . .

Fred Claire and Jeff Fellenzer will teach a Sports, Business and Media class next spring at USC’s Annenberg School for Communications. . . .

Few are as well qualified. Claire was a sportswriter before joining the Dodger front office, and Fellenzer wrote for more than one section at The Times, including sports, before becoming director of the Pete Newell Challenge in Oakland. . . .

There will be more fodder for the ACC vs. Pacific 10 basketball debate after tonight’s game in the Newell Challenge between North Carolina and California. Stanford plays Temple in the other game. . . .

Look for UCLA to play in the Challenge as soon as its schedule allows. Newell, 83, still serves as a mentor to the Bruins’ Steve Lavin. . . .

Lavin shouldn’t wait by the phone for one of his former mentors to call when Jim Harrick returns to town with Rhode Island for tonight’s game at Pepperdine.

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While wondering if Toledo was ever happier to be a college coach than on Monday, I was thinking: Ray Rhodes proves there’s no discrimination against African American coaches when it comes to getting fired, NBA players should have a chance to vote on the owners’ “last” proposal, let Dan Dierdorf go and bring back Dandy Don.