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Mentor Lends a Sisterly Ear to Teen at Risk

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SPECIAL TO THE TIMES

Bob’s Big Boy is hopping Saturday afternoons, so between bites of her hamburger and French fries, Bobbijean leans across the table, practically shouting out her stories about Mom, boys and school to her companion, who strains to hear over the din at this Toluca Lake hangout.

Bobbijean’s Big Sister, Dara Monahan, focuses intently on the freckle-faced 15-year-old, observing the young woman’s body language, searching for any hidden meaning in the stories.

Monahan digs into her grilled cheese sandwich and, with the ease of a practiced listener, waits until Bobbijean pauses, then responds animatedly to the teenager’s recitation of the week’s events.

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Monahan, 34, doesn’t preach, lecture or scold. Rather, she advises without condescension, giving a grown-up’s take on her “little sister’s” feelings about divorce, a grandmother’s death and the vagaries of teenage life. Then it’s off to the movies or a stroll in the park.

“Dara is my best friend,” Bobbijean said of the Big Sister she connected with two years ago. “I can tell her everything, even things I can’t tell my mom. It’s like talking to someone my own age.”

“It was definitely love at first sight,” Monahan said. “This experience has changed my life.”

Although she can sit and absorb teenage angst for hours, Monahan’s animated facial expressions and outbursts of laughter betray a barely contained energy. She’s the first to admit she’s had a great life and is eager to share the advantages of her happy upbringing with kids who haven’t been equally blessed. Big Sisters has provided the perfect outlet.

“I was the youngest of four kids in a very loving family,” Monahan said. “And when you’re that lucky, you have to share the experience. I know it sounds corny, but it’s true.”

The Big Sisters of Los Angeles, which matches female mentors with at-risk girls, couldn’t believe their good luck in landing Monahan. The New York native came to Los Angeles eight years ago to work with the TV writing team of Harry Thomason and Linda Bloodworth-Thomason.

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After five years as an associate producer and writer, among other positions with the TV production company, Monahan got wind of the volunteer program in 1995 and jumped on board. The match was made in heaven.

“Dara is incredible, exceptional,” said Jeannee Ow, director of program services for the Big Sisters of Los Angeles. “She’s genuine, dependable, passionate about what we do, and she’s always available to help recruit other volunteers.”

Not that Big Sisters are just plucked off the street. They undergo a thorough screening process and sign on for at least a year, ensuring stability for girls whose lives are often chaotic.

In between TV-writing gigs, regular meetings with Bobbijean and weekly shopping trips for homebound seniors, Monahan is chairwoman of the Big Sisters/Catholic Big Brothers annual “Bowl for Kids’ Sake” fund-raiser Saturday in Studio City.

Cosponsored by a local radio station, the service organizations hope the public will drop by and, for a $50 donation, bowl awhile and munch on some pizza.

“What we do at Big Sisters isn’t about money,” Monahan said. “You are just giving them some survival skills, handing them a few life lessons. Hopefully they take some of that with them. I see myself as just being a good friend.”

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No argument there.

Personal Best is a weekly profile of an ordinary person who does extraordinary things. Please send suggestions on prospective candidates to Personal Best, Los Angeles Times, 20000 Prairie St., Chatsworth 91311. Or fax them to (818) 772-3338.

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