The Last Place to Try This Sport

In its “Best of ‘98” survey, the Pasadena Weekly asked readers to name the most likely place to be “busted for skateboarding.”

One wise-guy responded:

“On a skateboard.”

NO HORSE-SENSE: I’ve mentioned some of the illustrious goofs of Southland high school spellers--the “Knocks Very Farm” amusement park, for instance.

But adults can, of course, be pretty creative, too. Robert Peskay of Moorpark writes that in the 1950s, when he worked for the Atomics International division of an aerospace company, it often received letters addressed to Tom Mix International.

MORE MIX-UPS: Richard Dungan of Redondo Beach noticed that someone had a darn tough time spelling “Yankees” on a marquee (see photo). Then, again, the sign-maker might well qualify for a position with the company whose ad was spotted by Catherine Rappoport of Hermosa Beach (see accompanying).

A DOCTOR WITH DIRTY HANDS? “Years ago the sociologists wrote about the ‘medicalization’ of our society but I think things have gone too far!” quipped Dan Fink of L.A., after spotting a truck from Dirt Surgeon Backhoe Service parked next to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center.

COLLEGE CONFIDENTIAL (CONT.): I thought I had run out of stories of little-known UCLA schools when I received a message from Alice Raskoff. She said her late husband had attended UCSB on Vermont Avenue early this century. The initials were no joke. They stood for the University of California, Southern Branch. The campus moved to Westwood in the late 1920s and her husband became one of the first UCLA graduates. And the initials UCSB now seem to be forgotten.

FOR BETTER OR FOR VERSE: The other day I recounted a half-century-old poem about L.A.’s smog that went:

View?

Phew!

To those of you who recall the item, I’m sorry I had to burden you with the entire work, again. Anyway, Gersten Schachne and Leonard Gazin were so inspired that each recalled an epic of similar dimensions. Titled “Fleas,” it goes like this:

Adam

Had ‘em

And Alan Simon sent along an Eli Siegel poem titled “One Question.” It reads (in full):

I . . .

Why?

THE WISDOM OF THE AGES: Siegel’s masterpiece reminded me of a possibly apocryphal story I heard while attending USC. A student was supposedly awarded an A in a philosophy course on the strength of his response to the one and only question on the final exam.

The question: “Why?”

The student’s response: “Why not?”

I wonder what grade the professor would have given if the response had been, “Adam had ‘em.”

miscelLAny

Erv Nichols of Pasadena noticed that his new medical care booklet from Blue Cross says, under the heading Emergency Care: “It is important that you immediately contact your Medical Group or Primary Care Physician before seeking medical services. However, if you are unconscious or your illness or injury makes immediate medical care necessary, you should seek medical treatment immediately.” Sounds like Blue Cross’ writer was a bit unconscious, too.

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Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.