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Rocker Sings the Blues Over Exotic Roadster

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Lee Michaels, best known for the radio-friendly ‘70s hit “Do You Know What I Mean,” says joy-riding mechanics raced and crashed the new, exotic roadster he had taken to his dealer for servicing.

The rocker, who also owns the chain of Killer Shrimp restaurants, had purchased the car, a black 1997 Panoz Aiv Roadster, just six weeks earlier. It was his baby--a tiny, powerful two-seater Michaels describes as “like driving a Coke can with an aluminum V-8.”

The mechanics ran into a power pole, snapped off a wheel and bent the frame, Michaels contends.

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The Georgia-made Panoz is a collector’s item, Michaels said. Only 55 of them were made in 1997, and only 73 this year. He liked the little roadster so much, he had his home remodeled so the car could be displayed as a work of art in his living room.

Michaels’ Los Angeles Superior Court lawsuit against Peyton Cramer Ford of Torrance seeks compensatory damages of $80,000 and punitive damages of $16 million. It claims the mechanics crashed the car while showing off for photographers from Car & Driver magazine.

Not content to suffer in silence, Michaels also has created a Web site, where he has posted the suit for all to see. The site, www.peytonford.com, also solicits other “Peyton Cramer service horror stories.”

The dealership had no comment.

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FEELING THEIR OATS: The original Natural Sex pill was made of avena satria, also known as oats. Its satisfied customers included a screenwriter, an actress, a sex therapist, a publicist for “America’s Funniest Home Videos” and a couple who publishes comic books.

Joined by a nationally prominent sexologist, they appeared in 1995 on TV’s “Hard Copy” to extol the virtues of the homeopathic remedy that they said had done wonders for their sex lives.

Two years later, through the miracle of video editing, they claim they became unwitting shills in oft-repeated infomercials for an inferior sex pill they had never tried, much less endorsed.

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Now, Kirk Sullivan, Dr. Patti Britton, Sandra Margot, Michele Correy, Thia Dearwater and Wendy and Richard Pini are seeking in excess of $400,000 in damages for libel, invasion of privacy, false advertising and unwanted commercial exploitation.

Their Los Angeles Superior Court suit claims a Florida company called the Life Extension Foundation Inc. and a Delaware infomercial company called MOR Music TV Inc. pirated their names and likenesses to market the wrong sex pill. “Hard Copy” is not a defendant in the suit.

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TRUTH OR TABLOID?: Arnold Schwarzenegger says he is fully recovered from heart valve surgery last year--and to prove it, he has filed a $50-million libel suit against a supermarket tabloid that recently reported his “heart crisis.”

An Aug. 4 Globe story said the mega-star is weak and fears keeling over from a heart attack. It stated that Schwarzenegger hadn’t made a movie in two years and that his wife, Maria Shriver, had so restricted his activities that he couldn’t play touch football with the Kennedy kin.

It’s baloney, according to a lawsuit filed in Superior Court in Santa Monica by attorney Martin D. Singer.

“The article is a complete and utter fabrication and fiction,” court papers say. “Inevitably, the result of such a portrayal is to make Schwarzenegger less believable as an action hero, less viable in such roles, and thereby damage his movie career.”

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The Globe stands by its cover story, which claimed, among other things, that doctors warn that the star has “a ticking time bomb in his chest.” The story quotes the usual anonymous sources, “insiders” and “close pals,” as well as a Beverly Hills heart specialist who isn’t actually treating Schwarzenegger.

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ET TU, COUNSELOR?: There should be a ballad somewhere in this item. Country music icon Merle Haggard says his longtime lawyer has done him wrong. He’s seeking $10 million in damages from attorney Michael H. Starler, according to papers in Los Angeles Superior Court.

A fee dispute between Haggard and Starler led to the singer’s countersuit, which claims Starler overcharged him and botched royalty deals and a divorce case.

He has retained a new attorney. Starler, who represented Haggard from 1984 until recently, was unavailable for comment.

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LIKE A VIRGIN: Priscilla Presley’s honor remains, well, intact as a result of a legal settlement bringing her $75,000 from a man who claimed she wasn’t a virgin on the day she married Elvis.

The judgment was lodged against Currie Grant, a former Army buddy of the King’s, in Superior Court in Santa Monica. Grant claimed in the unauthorized biography “Child Bride” that he had slept with Priscilla--then 14--before introducing her to Elvis.

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“I am very pleased that I have been vindicated,” Presley said.

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