Play’s the Thing

Who Wants to Spend like a Millionaire?

Just about everyone, it seemed, who made it to the “Toys for Big Boys and Girls Expo” at the Long Beach Convention Center over the weekend.

“The toys are unbelievable,” said attorney Tom Wong of Century City, who’d been invited by the expo’s sponsor, American Express. “A lot of it is yuppie-ish, but a lot of it is just plain, ‘Do you want to flaunt it?’ ”

A $32,000 Harley trike did send his pulse racing.

“It’s the equivalent of a [Lexus] ES 300,” Wong said, weighing the pros and cons of spending 32 grand on a three-wheel motorcycle, converted by a company in Alberta, Canada. “It does get 50 miles per gallon,” said his wife, Carolyn, encouragingly.

Indeed, those with the urge to splurge--and money to burn--would have no trouble filling their toy boxes with $45,000 personal helicopters, $26,000 sailboats or even $333,000 Momo Edition Lamborghinis (hurry, hurry, only 12 built!).

Some expo attendees merely came to see how big and expensive the “toys” could get. Among them were the Haneses of Covina, all five of whom found something for their wish lists. “We each took turns seeing our favorite thing,” said dad Bill Hanes. But, added his wife, Trish, “We need to win the lottery to actually buy them.”

Genevieve Hanes, 6, tickled the keys of a $17,000 computerized piano from the Van Koevering Co. of Anaheim. Her wide-eyed brother, 13-year-old Tim fell for a kayak and a $9,800 JetBike marketed as the “world’s only motorcycle for the water.”

Not everything was stratospherically priced.

“We were looking at the Hummer stretch limo,” Bill said. “We have a 17-year-old who’s going to the prom. That would be a cool, safe thing to rent [at $150 per hour with a four-hour limit]. If you’re looking for a $20 gift,” Bill deduced, “this is the wrong place to come.”

Expo territory expanded beyond toys to exotic travel. Trips ranged from camp-outs and cattle drives at the Bar BK Muleshoe Ranch in Arizona (with a private cabin, fireplace and hot tub at your service) for $1,875, to a monthlong private “Ancient Crossroads” expedition in a specially outfitted Boeing 757, which visits the world’s “great trade routes and ancient empires” for $29,950 per person.

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The most gawked-at toy at the show was the Boaterhome, a half boat, half motor home that sails the freeways as well as the ocean blue. Reminiscent of the half-and-half cartoon creature “Catdog,” the mechanized hybrid costs $125,000.

All kinds of wheels were hot at the expo. Besides the stretch Hummer, PacifiCoach of Encinitas offered the “ultimate limousine,” a customized, full-size bus ($700 for four hours, or $2,000 for a 24-hour trip to Las Vegas). The interior includes 35- and 25-inch TVs, two VCRs, a full-size refrigerator and a bathroom. Three parties booked the bus on opening day of the expo, said owner Vince Moroney; one will turn the coach into a Rose Bowl party-mobile, another is planning a kid’s birthday bash and the third will take a wine-tasting trek to Temecula.

In the Kids at Play area, the Governor family of Anaheim Hills--Brian, Terry and their 12-year-old daughter, Alicia--test-drove the adult-size tricycles.

“It’s not like the one I had as a kid,” reported Terry, as she buzzed around on the trike. Indeed, these sturdy $245 tricycles, from American Images of Cypress, will hold up to 285 pounds. The accompanying luxury wooden wagons--complete with canopy, cup holders, cooler and a cushy seat--cost $700.

The wheels that Brian Governor really wanted to park in his driveway however, were attached to a cherry-red Lamborghini.

“We didn’t even ask the price,” Terry Governor said. (That would be the Momo . . . and that would be $333,000.)

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Among the most eccentric toys we examined was the Solace Hyperbaric Chamber, which looked like a 7-foot tube of toothpaste. The chamber, priced at $5,500, claims to “increase circulation and reduce fat,” by forcing oxygen through the body, accomplished while its occupant naps.

“It’s like what Michael Jackson used,” promised the enthusiastic representative from Bird Products Corp. in Palm Springs.

For those who would rather be awake while they burn fat, there’s the 4-Minute CrossTrainer, a futuristic-looking workout gadget from the Van Nuys-based company Romfab. What appears to be part rowing machine, part stair-stepper, is said to burn calories in a fraction of the time it takes with the ordinary workout (it’s $10,000 cost takes it out of the ordinary, too). Expo-goers were encouraged to do the full four-minute workout and ended up wobbling back to the Hyperbaric Chamber. Burning fat while you sleep . . . now that’s a priceless thing.