For Adoptees, It’s a Family Affair at Last

Blond hair neatly brushed to one side and dressed in his Sunday best, 4-year-old Steven Stachkunas smiled as his new parents signed his official adoption papers in court Friday afternoon. Then Steven’s dad gave him a high-five.

“The waiting is over,” Brian Stachkunas said. “It’s nice to have our family together.”

Ever since Brian and Valerie Stachkunas became Steven’s foster parents two years ago, they knew they wanted to adopt him.

“How can you resist him?” Stachkunas said. “Those big brown eyes--that smile?”

Nine families, including the Stachkunases, finalized their adoptions Friday in Superior Court Judge Colleen Toy White’s courtroom. In honor of Adoption and Permanency Month, White opened her normally confidential proceedings to the public.

“I just want to make sure that people know that there are children out there who need homes,” White said. “These kids need moms and dads and brothers and sisters.”

About 200 children are adopted each year in Ventura County. Some are infants linked with their adoptive parents through private and international organizations. Others are officially adopted by their stepparents. And still others are abused or neglected children who have spent years in foster care.

Foster care adoptions have increased in recent years in California and the nation as a result of aggressive efforts to find permanent and safe homes for children. Fifty-six foster children were adopted in 1998-99 in Ventura County, compared with 46 last year and 32 two years ago.

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But as of Sept. 30, 117 Ventura County foster children still awaited adoption, according to Dennis Trenton, adoption supervisor for the county. While some of those children have been preliminarily matched with adoptive parents, dozens are still living in foster care while their social workers search for potential parents and stable homes.

“We are always looking for flexible families,” Trenten said. “We need to have people willing to take a variety of children.”

Trenten said the county doesn’t have any problem placing infants for adoption, but said it’s much more difficult to place older children and those of other races. He also added that the county has trouble finding homes for siblings and children with emotional or physical disabilities.

“We have many families waiting for children,” he said. “But the reason they are waiting is because they are not willing to take the children we have. And adoption is one of the best things we can give these children, because it gives them a family to protect them.”

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Peggy Lukens’ adoption of 2-year-old Nila was finalized Friday afternoon in an adjacent courtroom. Nila, who is from Calcutta, India, has been living with Lukens and her partner, Miki McFadden, in Ventura since February.

“I’m very excited,” Lukens said. “It’s really nice to finally have everything finalized, because it’s been a very long and arduous process.”

When 16-year-old Tara became Peter and Naomi Tolley’s foster child three years ago, she had green hair and an attitude. The couple already had adopted two other children--Brian, 7, and Amber, 16.

“We told the social worker that Tara could only stay a few weeks,” said Naomi Tolley of Santa Paula. “Then we called back and said, ‘Please don’t take her.’ ”

Tara, a poised and bubbly teen, was dressed in a sharp black suit Friday afternoon. She smiled constantly, revealing a mouthful of braces. And every few minutes, she wiped the tears and smeared mascara from her eyes.

A few of Friday’s adoptions were by stepparents.

“Congrats, you’ve just become a father,” White told Larry Green of Oxnard after he officially adopted his wife Dierdre’s 7-year-old daughter, Carmen.

Friday’s event seemed more like a birthday party than an official court proceeding. Stuffed animals, toy cars and candy filled a table in front of the courtroom. The jury box, decorated with red and blue balloons, was filled with cheering family members and friends.

And instead of presiding from her bench, White sat at a table with the parents and children. Both the parents and the children--if they were old enough to write--signed the official papers binding them together. White added a colorful sticker to each certificate, congratulated the new parents and gave each child a toy and a new last name.

White said she looks forward to Friday afternoons all week. From Monday to Thursday, she presides over cases involving abused and neglected youths. She said she hopes Friday’s adoptions will inspire people to come forward as foster and adoptive parents.

“The reason you see lots of tears is because the parents have been along a tough road with these kids,” she said. “And they provide for these kids what no court can, what no institution can.”