PIGSKIN PROPHECIES

Bitter and disconsolate after only managing a tie earlier in the season against your Swami, prep Pooh-Bah Eric Sondheimer has returned to try his luck in the playoffs. We’re shaking in our Aladdin shoes. NOT! Actually, we’re surprised Eric was available, considering the way he’s been blubbering like a baby since his beloved Bruins lost to the Trojans. He’ll need another hankie after Notre Dame loses to Valencia. For those of you wondering about last week, I beat staff gourmet Steve Henson, whose wife is forcing him to have his stomach stapled after his latest restaurant-hopping binge.

The Prophet

Season totals for The Prophet: 112 of 164 (68%), 185 points

Eric Sondheimer

Season totals for the guests: 105 of 164 (64%), 173 points

GAME OF THE WEEK (5 points)

Notre Dame vs. Valencia at Canyon High

THE PROPHET SAYS: Due to a production error, the line “Valencia’s passing game streaks into new millennium” was altered last week. Our apologies. Sondheimer has been wearing his leprechaun outfit and channeling the spirit of Knute Rockne in a sad effort to give Notre Dame an advantage. Wrong Notre Dame, Dude. The Knights’ only loss this season, against Alemany, came when Sondheimer picked them to win. We all know what that means. He’s the kiss of death! Valencia, 28-24.

OTHER TOP GAMES (each 3 points)

Mater Dei at Alemany

THE PROPHET SAYS: Concerned Mater Dei officials contacted Alemany to make sure their hordes of obnoxious, red-clad fans would have somewhere to sit. Here’s how to make them feel really welcome: set up a few card tables and folding chairs and tell them it’s bingo night at the Santa Ana Elks Lodge. Mater Dei is favored, but confusion reigns on the Monarch sideline after Coach Bruce Rollinson leaves suddenly to pursue a phony college job lead. Mater Dei, 35-24.

Highland vs. Saugus at College of the Canyons

THE PROPHET SAYS: Highland thinks it’s going to win because it has a good defense. Oh, please. The Golden League is looking pretty tarnished after opening the playoffs 1-4, compared to 4-0 for the Foothill League. David Parker’s passes will look like guided missiles to Highland’s confused secondary. Saugus, 38-14.

Newbury Park vs. Buena at Ventura High

THE PROPHET SAYS: This game could be more interesting than expected, considering the way Newbury Park routed Righetti and Buena struggled against Moorpark last week. A close call might be exactly what the Bulldogs needed. Buena, 34-20.

THE REST (1 point each)

* Granada Hills vs. Carson at Long Beach Veterans Stadium: Sondheimer: This would be a bigger upset than Granada Hills beating Carson in the 1987 City final. Carson, 35-14. The Prophet: Carson, 27-21.

* Kennedy vs. Crenshaw at Fremont High: Sondheimer: Kennedy’s passing attack is outstanding, but Crenshaw’s defense is better. Crenshaw, 21-14. The Prophet: Kennedy, 28-22.

* Chatsworth at Palisades: Sondheimer: Chatsworth is ready to expose the Dolphins as an overrated team. Chatsworth, 42-35. The Prophet: Chatsworth, 31-28.

* St. Francis at Canyon: Sondheimer: Coach Bill Redell of St. Francis ought to be thanking someone for his team’s weak playoff draw. St. Francis, 49-21. Prophet: St. Francis, 31-14.

* Arroyo Grande vs. Ventura at Rio Mesa High: Sondheimer: Tyler Ebell had better get his gym shorts ready for basketball season. Arroyo Grande, 28-7. The Prophet: Arroyo Grande, 26-21.

* Camarillo at Westlake: Sondheimer: Here’s a news flash: Westlake has the best defense in the region. Westlake, 35-7. The Prophet: Westlake, 42-15.

* Hart vs. Muir at Pasadena City College: Sondheimer: So Muir really thinks it has a shot at winning this game? Yeah, and the Clippers will reach the NBA finals. Hart, 42-14. The Prophet: Hart, 32-17.

* Harvard-Westlake vs. Garey at Mt. San Antonio College: Sondheimer: Win or lose, freshman quarterback Richard Irvin of Harvard-Westlake is the real deal. Garey, 35-14. The Prophet: Garey, 27-18.

* Nordhoff at San Jacinto: Sondheimer: The Rangers can’t wait to play St. Bonaventure. Nordhoff, 24-14. The Prophet: Nordhoff, 28-14.

* St. Bonaventure at Santa Paula: Sondheimer: Coach Jon Mack is laughing his way to the Division XI championship. St. Bonaventure, 49-7. The Prophet: St. Bonaventure, 41-10.

* Paraclete vs. Montclair Prep at Valley College: Sondheimer: This could be the best game of the week. Paraclete, 35-34. The Prophet: Paraclete, 32-28.