Hot Dog Suit? This Fan Said a Mouthful

During the Blue Jays’ 16-10 loss to the Angels last week at the Toronto SkyDome, club personnel were firing hot dogs at the fans with a cannon called the Hot Dog Blaster. But the cannon packed too much power, showering fans with fragments of franks and bits of bun.

Most of the fans thought it was funny. Not Sarah Higginson, a vegetarian seated just above the visitor’s dugout. “If I get sprayed with meat, I’m suing SkyDome,” she told the National Post. “I don’t think they considered the whole vegetarian thing.

“What if I had my mouth open and a piece of hot dog landed in my mouth? I can’t even walk by a hot dog stand without gagging. Imagine being sprayed by weiner shrapnel. I would have died.”

There, there.

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Trivia time: Which team holds the record for points in an NBA playoff game?

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How suite it is: From the Gallery column of the San Diego Union-Tribune: “It’s a good time to be a Boston Celtics or Bruins luxury suite patron, if you don’t mind that the teams stink.

“The leases that those patrons signed five years ago when the FleetCenter opened are expiring, and the arena’s powers-that-be are taking some of those customers on an all-expenses- paid cruise to Bermuda in September to induce them to re-sign.

“The suites average more than $100,000 a year. The Boston Globe says FleetCenter will spend more than $1 million on the cruise.”

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Kobe’s gig: Laker assistant coach Tex Winter to the Sacramento Bee on Kobe Bryant: “I think he sensed himself playing the same role as Michael Jordan played, and he does somewhat. After all, he’s averaging 20-some a ballgame when the center is averaging 30.”

Not even Jordan, Winter said, would have averaged 30 points if he were playing with Shaquile O’Neal.

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Unlikely: Jim Armstrong of the Denver Post on University of Florida sophomore forward Mike Miller’s decision to turn pro:

“The surgeon general has determined that holding your breath waiting for another 20-year-old kid from South Dakota to take his act to the NBA can be hazardous to your health.”

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Looking back: On this day in 1986, Roger Clemens set a major league record by striking out 20 batters as the Boston Red Sox defeated the Seattle Mariners, 3-1.

Trivia answer: Boston, 157 against New York on April 28, 1990.

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And finally: Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle on Morris Engelberg, the late Joe DiMaggio’s lawyer:

“When it comes to matters of the heart, Engelberg is like Woody Allen’s dad. Woody once held up a pocket watch and said, ‘This has great sentimental value. My father, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.’ ”