Hey, the NFL Is No Laughing Matter

Good evening, ladies and germs, hey, how about that new “Monday Night Football”? Take those guys . . . please! They fit like O.J.’s glove! Badda bum! But seriously, folks, that broadcast was stiffer than a Viagra convention! Hey! Love your shirt--did you fall through an awning? I gotta tell ya, some of those linemen should have their own ZIP Code! Hey-ooooo! So, what’s the difference between “Monday Night Football” and the Titanic? Nothing! Thank you, thank you, enjoy the buffet, see you every Monday.

GARY DURRETT, Glendale

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Regarding Dennis Miller’s much-heralded debut: Frankly, the great majority of blue-collar fans don’t need a comedy show to stimulate our football fervor. When we watch, and listen to football, we want to be treated to substance and not a lot of pseudo-intellectual gibberish as Miller displayed Monday evening.

MIKE REINA, Glendora

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When Howard talked, I knew it was Howard. When “Dandy Don” talked, I knew it was Don. I even recognized Frank and could tell the difference between Al and Boomer. But, so help me, aside from the actual comments, I can’t tell the difference between Dan Fouts’ and Dennis Miller’s voices. Maybe a hearing aid would help, but I think ABC has a problem there.

MARTIN L. MORRIS, San Diego

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Is Rush Limbaugh still available?

EDWARD C. LOMAX, Los Angeles