Many of Life’s Lessons Are Lost on Uneasy Rider

I don’t understand why everybody is so down on Isaiah Rider.

Do you know that reporters actually gathered Thursday outside the Lakers’ practice facility with the expectation that Rider might be fired?

For what? Making fun of “Philip”?

I do that weekly.

For threatening a reporter?

I’d threaten me if interviewed by me.

For dogging it on the court?

You mean, like last Friday’s column.

For raising his voice to General Manager Mitch Kupchak?

You know how tall that guy is?

For being late?

I can’t remember the last time I made deadline.

For just being a jerk who doesn’t fit in?

I see no reason to go there.

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LET’S GET BACK to basics here folks.

“The good thing about our league is, as many bridges as you burn, you’ve got to burn 29 to be out of it,” Minnesota Timberwolves vice president Kevin McHale said long ago in discussing Rider. “[Rider] has burned a few. . . . Like I’ve always said, ax murderer by day, great player by night and you’ve got a job [in the NBA].”

This is what the Lakers agreed to when they added Rider to their roster, the leopard that will forever remain spotted. (I don’t know exactly what I just wrote there, but it kind of flowed.)

The Lakers knew they were in for a headache, but it came cheap and, as available players go, looked too good to pass up. They persuaded themselves they could ride it out, like every other team that takes on a headache and, because they have taken such a risk, they will keep giving him extra chances to justify the risk they took in signing him.

And this business about Rider knowing this is his last chance, of course, is nonsense. Once he finally goes too far and the Lakers deem that more damaging than what they are getting out of him, they will release him and he will turn up on someone else’s roster, announcing he’s excited to get a fresh start.

It’s history all over again--if that’s original, that’s a pretty good line. He was trouble in Atlanta, Portland, Minnesota and as sure as Jerry Buss is going to arrive at Staples Center each night with a new girlfriend, Rider is going to get in trouble in L.A.

“Whenever he wants to win, he will play me,” Rider said after being benched for yet another indiscretion. Close your eyes and it’s Dennis Rodman speaking at another time, another place, but for the same coach.

The only thing that separates Rodman and Rider is, Rodman knew his role on the court and accepted it. And when he threw a tantrum, it was not directed at Phil Jackson. Rodman was smart, but that doesn’t appear to be one of Rider’s strengths.

“Go ask Philip,” he told reporters the other night in mocking Jackson’s decision to keep him on the bench. “I don’t know. I can’t speak for him.”

Pushing the envelope is what Rider is all about. Late 15 minutes for a game, and that’s OK. Twenty-five minutes, now watch out. An hour . . .

But this is what Rider has going for him, what every talented but troubled player has going for him--the Lakers’ desire to win at all costs.

“Maybe when we struggle, I’ll play more,” he said. “If we struggle, there’ll be more of an urgency.”

And that’s why no one will ever get through to Rider: He knows someone will always need him.

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WHEN DODGER General Manager Kevin Malone says on a conference call that the team is not in the market for a catcher, what does that tell you?

The Dodgers are in the market for a catcher.

Fact is, they’ve already explored the possibility of adding Sandy Alomar to their roster, and now our Dodger beat writer, Jason Reid, says they may be concentrating their attention on Charles Johnson.

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THE AGENT FOR Alex Rodriguez would like the Dodgers to be more public about pursuing his client in order to drive up the price, and the Dodgers--flush from their success with pulling the Andy Ashby offer off the table, prompting him to sit up and beg for a second chance--appear uninterested in Rodriguez.

I still say they remain the best bet to get him--their way of making that Kevin Brown-like signing splash to save a boring off-season, hike expectations and give them something to market in the coming season.

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I NEVER HAD the good fortune to meet Vincent Ruiz, who died this week, but knowing his daughter, Ruth, who shines as a friendly, sensitive and hard-working public relations assistant in the Dodger organization, Vincent Ruiz must have been one great father.

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TRY TO COMPREHEND this: Tony Gwynn will stay with the San Diego Padres, and on top of his $2-million salary he will earn $1,000 for every plate appearance from 1-100; $1,500 from 101-200 and so on, making $15,000 for every plate appearance beyond 600. He gets an intentional walk--that’s a plate appearance and at least $1,000.

He may be the only player in baseball rooting for every game to go into extra innings.

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NOW THAT PLAYBOY is conducting its “Hottest Sports Babes” contest, asking which of 10 female sports broadcasters should win the prize to appear nude in the magazine, some of us are concerned that PLAYGIRL will respond with its “HOTTEST SPORTS COLUMNIST.”

I cannot speak for Bill Plaschke, but let me say right now that, no matter what happens, I will do nothing to jeopardize my journalistic integrity.

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TODAY’S LAST WORD comes in an e-mail from David:

“Sources confirmed that you are utterly unaware of what being a journalist is all about. Sources went on to say you barely passed your high school literature class.”

Last time I tell you anything, David.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at his e-mail address:t.j.simers@latimes.com.