Will Gore Aide Be Stripped of Title?

Al Gore supporters could use a laugh, I guess. Luckily for them, Pomona College’s alumni magazine carries a piece about the prankishness of alumnus Alejandro Cabrera, a deputy campaign press secretary to the vice president.

When Cabrera signed on to the campaign and was given a staff contract to fill out, the magazine says, “he modified his formal title, crossing out deputy press secretary and penciling in ‘exotic dancer.’

“The contract was processed as modified and Cabrera has business cards authenticating his unique contribution as the first stripper employed in a U.S. presidential campaign, at least in an official capacity.”

Could come in handy if Cabrera, like other Gore aides, has to find a new job outside politics.

DEMOCRATS WOULDN’T FIND THIS ONE SO FUNNY: “Do you have the new Florida doughnut?” a customer asked Larry Weintraub, co-owner of Randy’s Doughnuts in Inglewood .

“What’s that?” Weintraub asked.

“The one with the hanging doughnut hole,” the customer responded.

But maybe you guessed that.

SIREN CALL FOR SUGAR FREAKS: Randy’s, with its 22-foot tall plaster doughnut, is one of L.A.’s most frequently seen sights on television and in the movies.

Weintraub is so confident that the giant confection will lure customers from the nearby San Diego Freeway that he even allows his business to be kidded in commercials--as, for example, a 1997 Pepto-Bismol spot about stomach upsets.

Just the other day photographers took snapshots of the stand for a magazine ad--for the Jenny Craig weight-loss folks.

WE DARE YOU TO READ THIS: In a naked bid to boost ratings, this column is introducing a new “Danger!” section, beginning with these spine-chillers (see accompanying):

* An area that you definitely want to avoid if plants and animals give you skin problems (from Dave Bedell of Claremont).

* An eerie reference by the Pacoima Chamber of Commerce to the date that Christmas parade applications are due.

* A table saw that sounds like a danger to one’s fingers (from Jim Behm and Paul Coles). It was supposed to say “miter,” a carpentry term.

* Some windows that can hurt your fingers--if you still have fingers--in two different ways (from David Tormey of Fontana).

MAYBE HE’LL GET A CELL PHONE NOW: The police log of the Seal Beach Sun carried this item: “Pacific Coast Highway--A man was arrested for falling asleep inside a telephone booth and then refusing to leave when asked.”

miscelLAny:

I’m still waiting for El Segundo and Mission Viejo to change their grammatically incorrect names to La Segunda and Mision Vieja. In the meantime, Constance Bessada of Van Nuys mentioned a company with a flawed German name that did take corrective action some years ago. After complaints from customers that it should be Das (not Der) Wienerschnitzel, the hot dog chain rechristened itself as plain old Wienerschnitzel. No beef there.

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.