Funny, but This Doesn’t Sound All That Safe

Ever wonder what it would be like to drive a drag-racing funny car 300 mph?

Ron Capps, who drives one for Hall of Famer Don Prudhomme on the NHRA circuit, describes the sensation:

“A lot of times with the funny car body over you and being tucked back into the Camaro body as you are, it’s like being in the back seat of a production Camaro.

“To put it in perspective, if you take one of the new production Camaros and put a case of oil in the middle of the dashboard, then crawl into the back seat and sit on the hump of the back seat, that will give you a view of what I look at out of my funny car.

“Just picture yourself going down the track at 300 mph looking at the case of oil on the dashboard.”

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Trivia time: Who was the last 30-game winner in the major leagues?

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From the boss: San Francisco Giant Manager Dusty Baker, on first baseman J.T. Snow’s decision to quit switch-hitting and bat left-handed only:

“He’s fearless. That was a bold and brave move for him to make. Sometimes switch-hitters aren’t willing to do that. He stuck with it. Give him a lot of credit.”

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Polite society: The U.S. Military Academy is dropping its “kickin’ A” mule logo in favor of a sword-wielding knight on horseback, prepared for battle, with the words “Army” and “Black Knights” printed prominently across the bottom.

At least, the mule will remain the Army mascot.

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Not so big: When Bill Tilden was the world’s greatest tennis player, he was known as “Big Bill.”

Blackie Sherrod recalls in the Dallas Morning News that Tilden was “just one inch over 6 feet, the same altitude reached by the new Wimbledon female champ, Venus Williams.”

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Times change: The late Bill Veeck, who introduced to baseball the exploding scoreboard at Chicago’s Comiskey Park, the ivy at Wrigley Field, season tickets, bat days and midgets, did things differently in his day.

“Contrary to the way things are done today, where people who desire money meet with people and come back with an idea,” said his son and minor league owner Mike Veeck. “He felt you come to them with the idea first--and then sell it. You’ve got to be a hustler to get someone to pay for an exploding scoreboard, but it worked.”

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He should know: What is the most important shot in grass-court tennis?

“The second serve, not the first,” says former Wimbledon winner Andre Agassi.

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Trivia answer: Denny McLain of the Detroit Tigers, with 31 wins in 1968.

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And finally: Barry Bonds has never been a media favorite--nor vice versa. The San Francisco Giants slugger feels it’s because his father (Bobby) and godfather (Willie Mays) were former major league stars.

“I think that’s what really hurt me a lot,” he said. “Because it was always, ‘Oh, hi, Bobby. No! Barry!’ You know. . . . I just want to be Barry. ‘How ‘bout your godfather, Willie?’ Can I just be Barry?

“So I kind of rejected [the media]. If you didn’t accept me, I didn’t accept you. That kind of attitude.”