Andy Prieboy

* The creator of “White Trash Wins Lotto” is preparing the show for an off-Broadway run this spring.

Stayin’ Alive: To me, the weekend means drunks, bar fights, high-speed chases and other rascally high jinks of youth. On Friday and Saturday, I prefer to lie low, get work done and stay alive. So you, as my guest, are free to create your own perfect weekend. When you’re all done, drop by my place on Sunday around 5. I’ll put a perfect capper on the perfect weekend. An evening of fine art, dining and cinema to add a highbrow touch to your low-life carousing.

First, Fine Art: I want to show you L.A.’s most intriguing mural: Norwood Market (the southeast corner of Hollywood Boulevard and Normandie Avenue). On the market wall, single line, crudely drawn milk cartons, eggs, raw chickens and burgers swirl above the head of an astonished Everyman. Dazzled, he declares: “I would like to eat some cereal!”

Let Him Eat Cereal: We’ll go someplace swanky and pricey. I’m hungry. Let’s go to Glendale. Hey! Come back! Get back in the car. I’m serious. Glendale. On Brand Boulevard inside the grand, old Bekins building is Cinnebar. Hip, not haughty, dark, intimate Cinnebar has a great, imaginative, modern menu. For a main course I suggest the maple glazed smoked pork chops. Cocktails are showy and potent, reviving many drinks from the gas-guzzling ‘50s. (Aging New Wave bar crawlers will recognize the ornate bar from Yim Ye Lu’s.) Fancy enough to make an impression, relaxed enough to linger, Cinnebar is always my first choice for excellent dining.

The Good, the Bad and the Arcane: Let’s head back to Silver Lake-Los Feliz and end the evening with some cinema noir. Mondo Video a Go-Go is the Floyd’s Barber Shop of the damned, depraved and downright dingy. A full cast of regulars, from Bunnyman to Rocketboy, paws through the endless array of insulting, arcane or blasphemous videos. The owner, gruff and lovable Rob, has decorated his shop windows with hate mail and an F rating. You are encouraged to smoke, although modesty forbids me to mention what Rob uses for ashtrays. As a courtesy to his customers, Rob has also decorated his cash register with the latest star obituaries.

So, Here We Are: Let’s hurry home with our cinematic gems; a ‘60s rock cheapie called “Bummer,” followed by the sure-to-be-sizzling “Nudes on the Moon.” You pop in the video, I’ll make us a little snack. What you in the mood for? Hey, me too! I would like to eat some cereal!