LAUGH LINES
- Share via
Untying the Knot: Fox has developed “ ‘I Want a Divorce,’ [which will] feature six couples with pending divorces. The couples will duke it out . . . by answering personal questions about one another, and in turn, win some of their shared marital assets. . . . Now, if they can just get Bill and Hillary to make an appearance.” (Mark Wheeler)
*
The Essential David Letterman
Top 10 Election Issues
Important to Dumb Guys
10. “Medicare coverage for swallowing a billiard ball.”
9. “Use part of budget surplus to buy everybody a free hat.”
8. “If you lose your wallet, the government should help you find it by using a satellite or laser or something.”
7. “Sure, waffles are delicious now . . . but will they always be?”
6. “Why don’t people on TV wave back at you?”
5. “We’ve got to be prepared for an invasion by Canexico.”
4. “Finding the one-armed man to finally clear the fugitive’s good name.”
3. “The next president gets to appoint, like, three new regulars to ‘The Hollywood Squares.’ ”
2. “Strengthening military so space monkeys can’t blow up the White House.”
1. “Candy or soda? (It’s a tie.)”
Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, 202 W. 1st St., Los Angeles, 90012.
