He’s One Leading Chant of ‘Let’s Go Raider Fans’

Now that 12 of our finest citizens have punched the bully in the nose, I believe it’s time to escort all remaining Raider fans out of Los Angeles.

We have been annoyed enough.

Does anyone have the phone number for City Councilman Nate Holden?

We can kill two birds with one stone here: Clipper owner Donald Sterling is a Raider fan who has been urging Al Davis to return to L.A.

I’ll miss James Garner, but he has to go.

Let’s clean up this city and there cannot be any exceptions . . . knowing what I do about hockey fans, I’d think most of them are Raider rooters. I could be wrong, but just to be safe, let’s get rid of them too.

And the way Darren Dreifort is pitching, I wouldn’t be surprised if the Dodgers start the rumor he’s a Raider fan.

NOW MOST of your basic hard-core Raider fans are already under lock and key, and while I’m not advocating that for everyone, I don’t see any harm in sentencing the rest of these losers to life in Oakland.

Once we get them all there, we just have to figure out a way to shut down Southwest Airlines so they don’t return.

I looked it up. The last time the Raiders won anything of significance, Kobe Bryant was 5 years old, and yet we’re constantly subjected to talk about the “greatness of the Raiders.”

More than that, like a neighborhood that has been terrorized by thugs extorting money for “protection,” this city has been held hostage by the Raiders’ rant that they own L.A.

That was nonsense, but it still went to a jury for verification.

Now the only good thing about that is the last 48 hours have been the most peaceful 48 hours in years with Raider fans finally shutting up.

LET’S GO back in time. First impressions had a young Al Davis looking unbeatable. The maverick football coach/owner changed the league, and enhanced his reputation with a dramatic victory in court at the NFL’s expense in the early ‘80s, empowering the bully to scare his business partners.

But then the football owner lost his edge on the football field, the commitment to excellence a joke and the threat of legal reprisal his only claim to power--and now that is gone too.

That leaves the lasting impression of Al Davis as the whiny loser who no longer gets it, a liar the way the jury judged him, who has sabotaged his own legendary grip on the game while leaving him stuck in Oakland.

Punch a bully in the nose, and he just cries and goes away.

I just hope he takes all the Raider fans with him.

THE NEWS gets only worse for the Raiders. The NFL voted to realign Tuesday but left Denver and Oakland in the same division, which means Mike Shanahan still gets to beat Davis twice a year.

PGA GOLF pro Roger Gunn, participating in the L.A. Sports & Entertainment Commission tournament at Riviera, told me Mel Gibson is the worst celebrity golfer he has ever seen--needing five shots with a seven-iron to advance the ball 15 yards.

I would like to go on record right now saying ABC’s Al Michaels, who received the “Media Award of Excellence” from the LASEC, is not that bad.

BY THE way, to the two caddies that Michaels hit with the same shot on No. 5, I’d like to apologize on his behalf.

AND IF the owner of the bulldozer off to the far right on No. 8 discovers his machine has a big dent, Michaels cannot be blamed. His tee shot fell short of the bulldozer.

I KNOW some people also expressed interest in his drive on No. 12, and I’m happy to report that he cleared the ladies’ tee--the ball rolling right across it until stopped by the weeds--out of bounds to the left.

I WAS placed in a group with Steve Brener, former Dodger PR guy and now L.A.’s best publicist; Larry Stewart, The Times’ radio and TV columnist in sports; and Jill Arrington, the CBS sideline reporter who won Playboy.com’s Sexiest Sportscaster award. How she beat out Michaels, I’ll never know.

Arrington rode in the same cart as Stewart. I got Brener. It could have been worse--I could have gotten Michaels and spent the day looking for wayward golf balls.

In addition to the Playboy contest, Arrington--a former Orange Bowl princess--had received national attention for wearing a tank top while working on the sideline. And I got Brener.

I asked Arrington about her picture on the Internet, the one with her in a black see-through negligee, because I’ve been married for 28 years and I didn’t know they made such things.

She said there’s no way it could be her, went home, called up the Web site and then e-mailed to say someone placed her head on someone else’s body. I figure that’s the only way I’m ever going to see my wife dressed the same way.

ARRINGTON CONSISTENTLY outdrove Stewart and Brener. And Michaels, for that matter. Arrington, 28 and a former tennis player at the University of Miami, also rolled well with every joke, although I think she was just grateful she didn’t have to ride with Brener.

She said she knows what people say about her good looks and how they might work against her in establishing credibility as a reporter, but “I was born this way, and all I can do is work hard to become as good I can.”

As you might imagine, I could relate.

TODAY’S LAST WORD comes in an e-mail from Toms:

“I just finished reading your ‘column.’ I’d like to know how you do it? David Copperfield has nothing on you. When a featured columnist of a widely read sports section puts in a day’s work by printing 18 e-mailings with weak comedic quips, while still holding the privilege to do it again--that’s magic.”

No, that’s a public service--letting you know what days I’m playing golf.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com