Police Log Shows Evidence That Suspect Tried to Forge a New Path in Crime

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For today’s episode of stupid criminal tricks, the Los Alamitos News-Enterprise police log reports that a woman “tried to cash a forged check,” left her ID behind, “then returned for her ID the next day.”

There’s no accounting for the behavior of some folks: Scott Wilson of Long Beach told me about a friend who boarded a crowded Blue Line train, pulled out a book and began to read. After a while, he noticed out of the corner of his eye that his disheveled seatmate seemed to be staring at him. The book-reader tried to concentrate but finally was unable to resist making eye contact. His seatmate broke into a smile and chirped, “Need someone to do your taxes for you?”

Traveler’s advisory: A reader’s mention of the town of Orgy, France, prompted Robert Spenger of Fullerton to point out that the town of Condom is in the southwest of that fun-loving country.


And a sighting of a Portuguese town with an eye-catching name was confirmed by Mary Anne Peterson and Charles Kaplan, who submitted evidence (see photo). That sign, by the way, would not look out of place by any Southern California freeway at rush hour.

For those with buyer’s remorse: Michele Saldonis of Redondo Beach sent a notice for a mansion that is equipped with a room where the new owners can brood about the $1,275,000 price (see accompanying).

The real hard sell: Braden Stoemner of San Juan Capistrano spotted an ad for a misting device that apparently hasn’t been too popular (see accompanying).

Something to lose sleep over? Larry Pfaadt of Covina writes: “I thought people died only once.” What puzzled Pfaadt was a statement in an American Pharmaceutical Assn. booklet: “People who reported sleeping eight hours or more per night died more often than those who slept six or fewer hours.”

Stupid driving tricks: On a visit to L.A., Dennis Mahoney spotted a freeway motorist who was “holding an open book in her left hand and holding a cell phone to her face with her right hand, and apparently reading from the book into the telephone.” Let’s hope this isn’t a new way for absentee parents to read to their children.

My long wait is over: I recently achieved a lifetime ambition as a baseball fan of more than 50 years: I finally caught a foul ball in the stands. The closest I had come previously was when a ball landed in my seat in Dodger Stadium--while I was in a concession line buying a beer. I must admit I didn’t catch this foul ball at a major league game but at my daughter’s softball game. Still, there was applause. And then there was silence as the spectators and players stared in my direction, as though waiting for something.


Hey, how was I to know I didn’t get to keep the ball?

miscelLAny: At a breakfast honoring Newport Beach’s top high school seniors, Brandon Powers related how his Speedo slid part way down his legs while he was competing in a 100-yard-butterfly event.

When he tried to pull the swimsuit up during the race, he was disqualified for breaking his stroke. But Powers saw the positive side of the incident. He told the Daily Pilot: “At least I wasn’t swimming the backstroke.”


Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 and by e-mail at steve.