He’s Worried About Foldout, Not Folding

My first inclination Saturday night was to go to Las Vegas, sit behind home plate and wave to Kevin Brown, who was going to be pitching for the Dodgers’ minor league team. I just thought it would be a hoot.

Then I got to thinking what if we’d booked the same Southwest Airlines flight to Las Vegas, I’m on the aisle, there’s only one middle seat left on the plane and Mr. Grumpy’s the last guy to board. I know one thing, I’m not getting on any plane with Mr. Grumpy without first being issued a parachute.

So I chose to go to Anaheim instead for the Angel-Yankee game and chat with Jarrod Washburn, every bit the gritty, fiery bulldog that Brown is with one exception: He likes human beings.

Three hours before game time I found Washburn sitting in the back of the clubhouse intently studying something. This is why the kid is 13-3, I figured, until I got closer and noticed he was analyzing this year’s “Playboy Playmate Review.” Just what you’d expect, of course, from someone who likes human beings.

“I’ve been waiting all week for this magazine,” he said, and because he was already to Miss October and late into the year, I told him I’d wait.

I joined the rest of the Angels, who were watching “Ocean’s Eleven” on the clubhouse TV, and while I found it a little odd the guys were skipping batting practice after scoring only 10 runs in the previous seven games, it was a good movie.

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THE ANGELS announced Saturday they were giving Darin Erstad $32 million to stay in Anaheim the next four years, and I know that’s what it would take for me to spend four years in Anaheim.

“I gave him a big hug,” said Washburn, who is being paid $350,000 this season as the Angels’ ace. “I make a mistake and this guy goes and runs it down and saves the day. He’s special.”

Now you spend any time with Washburn and he’s going to be talking about his teammates (or Miss October) and how good they are. He’s also going to tell you he knows folks are counting on him to fold after doing so late in the season the past two years--just like the Angels--but bring on the pressure.

“I love it,” he said.

The Angels, of course, will go nowhere without Washburn and the Rally Monkey. Remember last year when Washburn went ape because everyone in Edison Field sang “Happy Birthday” to the Rally Monkey?

“No regrets,” he said. “Some people think I talk before I think, but I know what I’m saying, and when I say something, I’ve got to live with it.

“I think the Rally Monkey is great for the fans to get everyone going, but the whole Happy Birthday business with the monkey jumping on home plate was stupid. Obviously the monkey wasn’t helping us that day while we were losing something like 14-1--he was probably too busy partying.”

Ask him a question, he looks you directly in the eye and provides an answer. It’s the way he pitches. Someone hits a home run off him on an inside fastball, and “almost every time, the next chance I get to pitch to him,” he said, “I’m going to give him an inside fastball because I’m coming right after him.”

Same with the Rally Monkey. Take away a three-run lead, as the Yankees did with Bernie Williams hitting a home run off Troy Percival in the top of the eighth, and the little fella is right up there on the scoreboard jumping up and down.

One pitch after the Monkey makes his appearance Saturday, Tim Salmon homers for a 5-4 lead in the bottom of the eighth, and the Angels go on to record a stirring victory. Washburn and the Rally Monkey, really two peas in the same pod, yeah, I wonder what he’s got to say about that?

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MY BEST to Chick Hearn, and while I know what doctors have said, I still have to be convinced that the kind and gentle man I know, who showed the stamina to work 3,338 consecutive Laker games, won’t be behind the microphone again.

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I UNDERSTAND Brown met with the media after his 3 2/3-inning stint against the Memphis Redbirds in Las Vegas. No report on how many casualties.

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ON THE board in the Angels’ clubhouse I saw this note: “Please pack bats before Sunday’s game,” with “before” underlined.” I didn’t like the Angels’ chances of scoring against the Yankees today before I saw the note. Now I’m really worried.

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MOST BASKETBALL fans know all about NBA make-up calls, but Saturday we got a real good look at a major league make-up call in Philadelphia.

The Dodgers had thrown a national tantrum after home-plate umpire Dan Iassogna had tossed Eric Gagne from a game earlier in the week. They made their point--winning an apology from umpiring officials, and getting the kindly call.

Two out in the ninth and two strikes on Shawn Green, and it was up to third base umpire Joe West to determine if Green had swung at strike three, as replays showed he did. West elected not to end the game on a Dodger strikeout.

Green homered on the next pitch to tie the score, and the Dodgers won in extra innings. With the Diamondbacks winning twice, and the Giants also victorious, Joe West just might be in line for a playoff share if the dramatic comeback puts the Dodgers back on track. At the very least, one ump made up for another’s bad call.

Some people think the fix is in when comes to who wins NBA playoff games; it would be nice to think the same thing happens in MLB. That would seem to be the Dodgers’ best hope.

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CNN broadcaster Larry King called with yet another correction: “I’ve only been married five times, and they are all still smiling.”

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in e-mail from Ken Lund:

“Your writing brings no insight to the sports world, no thought-provoking ideas or comments regarding the human and business side of sports. Your column is filled with meaningless fluff requiring little thought on your part, and less thought on the reader.”

And I thought I was writing over your head.

T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com.