Finding Grace in Life’s Contrasts

In the Green Bay Packer locker room sits a man in every sense of the word, a man of strength and integrity, of caring and depth, a man who became a new father and a grieving son on the same day.

Sitting in front of a locker sits a man who values his religion and his family, his education and the idea that a man must earn his salary and should never take a minute off when he is on the job.

And, his teammates say, a special man. “What Kabeer has shown us, is something very special,” teammate Vonnie Holiday said. “He is an unusual man.”

Kabeer Gbaja-Biamila and his wife, Eileen, welcomed their first child, a son, into their family two weeks ago. Later that day, having barely sunk into the exhausted sleep of supreme happiness, Gbaja-Biamila was awakened by a phone call from Los Angeles. The news was horrific. His mother, Bola, a vibrant, 53-year-old with seven children, had been killed in a car crash.

Less than a mile from her South Central home, Bola lost control of the car and hit a tree. The car burst into flames. The family still is not sure what caused her to lose control. Did Bola suffer some sort of medical problem? Was there trouble with the car?

Right now it doesn’t matter.

Since the funeral, Gbaja-Biamila, a defensive end, has played two football games.

Last Sunday, only four days after he returned from Los Angeles, at a time his teammates and coaches didn’t expect Gbaja-Biamila to play, at a time they would have supported his need to grieve and to focus on himself, Gbaja-Biamila played and played well against Minnesota. He had six tackles, a sack and a forced fumble. His relentless pressure on Viking quarterback Daunte Culpepper in the fourth quarter helped the Packers come back from a nine-point deficit to win.

And Sunday, here, where the rain had made a lake out of the parking lots and a swamp out of 3Com Park, Gbaja-Biamila played again.

He didn’t have the extravagant numbers of a week earlier because the conditions weren’t conducive to flamboyant plays.

Others can find a way to behave extravagantly.

Terrell Owens caught a touchdown pass in a game his San Francisco 49ers would lose, 20-14. He grabbed a bedraggled cheerleader’s gold pompoms and shook them while moving his hips.

Whether Owens was mocking the rain-soaked young woman or celebrating his greatness or taunting the Green Bay defense or maybe a little of all of that, his look-at-me, aren’t-I-great behavior cast a dreary day in a depressing light.

Gbaja-Biamila, who had 13 1/2 sacks last year and has 10 this year, is not given to extraordinary behaviors designed to make himself stand out.

“If I make a play, isn’t that what I’m supposed to do?” Gbaja-Biamila said. “My mother and I had great conversations about our religion and about what it means to be a Christian and in our faith, we treasured humbleness.”

It was hard for Gbaja-Biamila to speak of his mother on this day. She was to have come from Los Angeles to San Francisco to see her son play. Then her plan was to fly to Green Bay to see her new grandson, Abdul Rasheed.

“Right now, I’m just trying to enjoy the gift God gave me in this new child,” Gbaja-Biamila said. “But it’s still hard. I can’t fool myself. What happened on that single day, it’s going to affect me for a long time. But I know I’m going to be able to carry on because I know that’s what my mom would want of me, and I know God is going to give me strength. God says he wouldn’t give us anything we couldn’t handle and I’m really hanging my hat on that.”

Gbaja-Biamila, the son of Nigerian parents, grew up in South Central and went to Crenshaw High. He was a National Football Foundation Hall of Fame scholar-athlete in high school. He was one of 40 student-owners of a project that allowed teenagers to run a natural food company called “Food From the ‘Hood,” which offered South Central organic produce in neighborhood markets. For his efforts, Gbaja-Biamila had his picture on the cover of Newsweek. He remains active with the project and comes home in the summer to work out with Crenshaw athletes.

“My family taught us values,” Gbaja-Biamila said.

When he is asked who he admires most, or who his role model is, Gbaja-Biamila answers simply, “Jesus of Nazareth.”

Gbaja-Biamila was a three-year starter at San Diego State, but he wasn’t drafted until the fifth round by Green Bay in 2000. The Packers cut him in the preseason but re-signed him to the practice squad. Gbaja-Biamila, 6 feet 4 and 255 pounds, had his breakout season last year when he became the first Packer since Reggie White to have a double-digit sack total.

There was nothing unusual about how or why Gbaja-Biamila has played over the last two weeks, he said. “I’m a professional and I should act like one,” he said.

Acting like a professional seems to have different meanings for different professionals.

Waving a cheerleader’s pompoms is one way. Learning to be a father, having to mourn a mother, always being a good teammate is another.

Abdul Rasheed Gbaja-Biamila won’t have far to look to find his role model.

*

Diane Pucin can be reached at diane.pucin@latimes.com.