Davis Has Already Beaten Law of Averages

Sure, the Oakland Raiders lost the Super Bowl -- big -- but they lead the NFL in one area: litigation.

Records obtained by Associated Press show the Raiders and owner Al Davis have spent $33.5 million in legal fees -- and that’s only from 1997-2001.

“While most of our owners spend their time in the off-season building their businesses and cementing relationships with their communities, Mr. Davis spends his off-season in the courtroom,” NFL spokesman Joe Browne said.

On the docket currently: Suits against the city of Oakland over $1 billion in lost revenue from promised sellouts, the Internal Revenue Service over failed stadium deals and the NFL because it allegedly sabotaged a stadium proposal here.

Just this week, a San Jose judge dismissed a trademark infringement case against the NFL that tried to ban the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Carolina Panthers from wearing their usual road uniforms in California because their logo and colors too closely resemble those of the Raiders.

The judge added that the team could refile its case in federal court.

“The Raiders,” AP reported, “said they were exploring their legal options.” As always.

Trivia question: Who said, “Would I throw at my mother? Only if she was crowding the plate.”

Classified: Among others, Jerry Green of the Orlando Sentinel suggests these jobs for Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, formerly Iraq’s Minister of Information:

* Expansion director for the WNBA.

* Ghostwriter for Martha Burk’s autobiography: “My March Through Augusta.”

We can think of others: Boxing promoter ... Detroit Tiger ticket manager ... Raider community relations specialist ...

Striking back: Reporter Martin Henderson was offered the opportunity of traveling with defending Auto Club 500 champion Jimmie Johnson as he made a mad-dash tour of radio and television appearances this week, leading to Sunday’s NASCAR race in Fontana.

Those plans quickly unraveled, however, because track officials said Johnson’s representatives didn’t follow through with arrangements on their end.

A veteran reporter, Henderson was understanding. Still, he couldn’t help retaliating in a small way. So, given a choice on where to shop, Henderson said, “I went to Home Depot instead of Lowe’s to buy a new shower fixture last night.”

Johnson is sponsored by Lowe’s; Home Depot sponsors circuit rival Tony Stewart.

Welcomed guests: Because of their antiwar comments, “Bull Durham” stars Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins were not welcome this weekend at the Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, N.Y.

But HBO will have them.

They’ve been invited to participate in a round-table session on the season premiere of “On the Record With Bob Costas” May 2. Also appearing to commemorate the 15th anniversary of the 1988 baseball movie will be actor Robert Wuhl and writer-director Ron Shelton.

Trivia answer: Early Wynn.

And finally: NBC’s Conan O’Brien, on Carl Lewis’ recent drunk-driving arrest:

“He was so drunk it never occurred to him to just run away.”

-- Mike Hiserman