Aging overshadows love in predictable ‘Romance’

With the title “A Twilight Romance,” and with two stars who played squabbling middle-aged marrieds in a TV series more than two decades ago, it’s not hard to connect the dots and figure out what Mayo Simon’s new play at the Falcon Theatre is about.

Squabbling old unmarrieds.

This time around, Katherine Helmond and Robert Mandan, who formerly played the Tates on “Soap,” play elderly singles who alternately bicker and contemplate marriage to each other.

The comedy has a few moments of amusement and a few less amusing moments in which the loneliness of old age begins to sink in.

But generally it’s a predictable exercise that’s primarily a star vehicle for two aging actors.

Netty, 84, and Gilbert, 82, live in their own San Diego apartments. She’s Jewish; he’s a Christian who isn’t above making an occasional anti-Semitic remark, despite his professed love for the Jews.

Netty’s a widow, after 53 years of one marriage. Gilbert has been a philanderer, with several marriages under his belt and with a possible affair going on right now with his “cleaning woman,” Tiffany.

Gilbert was in the Navy for decades, keeps a gun and wants to be married again. Netty likes to dabble in ceramics and listen to heavy drama on the radio. She has no interest in guns or other emblems of violence and resists Gilbert’s proposals. He has a heart condition; she is almost blind.

Neither of them mentions any children or other relatives, living or dead, which seems a bit far-fetched. So do their formulaic reconciliations, considering how much they get on each other’s nerves. But Simon wants to underline their solitary states and their subsequent desperation to have some sort of social contact, no matter how much they annoy each other.

We don’t see their “meet cute” moment, but fans of cuteness among the aged should be relieved to hear that many of this couple’s subsequent moments together are also mildly cute.

The stars don’t look as old as their characters, but they know how to play old. And their years of working together on “Soap” apparently gave them an easy familiarity with each other’s rhythms on stage. Under the direction of Jules Aaron, their exchanges are well-timed, and the quips are professionally fired off.

Roy Abramsohn plays a young doctor who treats both Netty and Gilbert, listening to her complain about her suitor even more than she does about her health. A turntable efficiently moves Robert Frye’s sets around the stage.

Netty was also one of the leading characters in another Simon play from more than a decade ago, “The Old Lady’s Guide to Survival.” “A Twilight Romance” initially was announced under the title “The Old Lady in Love.” Perhaps Simon realized that Netty’s survival is much more clear-cut than the status of her love.

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‘A Twilight Romance’

Where: Falcon Theatre, 4252 Riverside Drive, Burbank.

When: Wednesdays-Saturdays, 8 p.m.; Sundays, 4 p.m.

Ends: March 2.

Price: $25-$37.50.

Contact: (818) 955-8101.

Running time: 1 hour, 50 minutes.