Lakers Are a Respite From the Daily Grind

It has been a grueling few days. It began with an expensive date with the UCLA women’s basketball team, followed by heated words Saturday night with Clipper General Manager Elgin Baylor over something Coach Alvin Gentry said, and then came word Baylor decided to fire Gentry the next day.

Sentenced to a three-day stretch with host Max Kellerman beginning Monday, and I believe we could reduce the crime rate if offenders were threatened with having to watch ESPN’s “Around the Horn” with the sound turned up -- I didn’t think it could get any worse until I got the call from San Diego I’ve been dreading.

The oldest daughter said she might be moving to the Los Angeles area now that she’s quit her job and I’d be supporting her again, and once word of that sweetheart deal got out, the Spanos Goofs announced a short time later they might be joining her.

I needed a little entertainment to brighten things up -- so I went to the Laker game at Staples Center. I had forgotten to reserve a seat, so John Black, the Laker publicity director, asked if I’d mind sitting courtside behind the Laker Girls, who were wearing the same kind of black skin-tight tops over bare flat bellies and black skin-tight bottoms that the wife had worn 35 years ago. Like I needed that reminder.

I’m not a complainer, so I didn’t ask to change my seat and didn’t even object when the Laker Girls jumped up and down, blocking my view. I figured Kobe Bryant would soar above it all, and either way I’d have a night to remember.

Then the game started, and Kobe passed, passed again and then passed again. I was afraid that might happen when I read in the paper about Phil Jackson joking about a doctor telling him they had named one of his kidney stones after Kobe, “because it wouldn’t pass.”

Who wants to go to a Laker game, besides Shaquille O’Neal, and watch Kobe do nothing but pass the ball? He passed it to Derek Fisher, who missed from long range, passed to Rick Fox, who missed from long range, then again to Fisher who missed. With seven minutes left in the first quarter, Kobe hadn’t shot yet.

Now I wouldn’t let anybody but Kobe shoot the ball with Shaq rebounding the shots he misses and putting them back in because that’s entertainment. I might even put handcuffs on Devean George so he gets the hint.

Kobe needed only 14 points to become the youngest player in NBA history to reach 10,000 points, and he didn’t get there that fast by passing the ball to George. I tried to catch his eye, but one of the Laker Girls intercepted it, and that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

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THE FIRST half ended, and while I was bored with Kobe scoring only eight points, the Lakers looked like world champs again, pounding the Indiana Pacers, 54-37. Nice to know Phil & Co. were probably pretty happy, but then I suspect no matter what the score they’d have gone to the locker room with a smile on their faces after noticing Mariah Carey sitting courtside.

Now I’m always waiting for Kobe’s next highlight move, but it became obvious the Pacers were trying to intimidate Shaq, which was pretty funny. They were throwing body after body at him like some kind of football tackling drill, and all he did was smite them by scoring and making his free throws.

If the rest of the Western Conference gets a look at videotape of this performance by Shaq they’ll spend the next few weeks doing everything they can to avoid the Lakers in the playoffs. They throw championship parades for guys who play like this night after night.

The Pacers are probably one of three Eastern Conference teams, along with the Nets and Pistons, to have the best chance to make the NBA Finals, and the Lakers were mauling them without getting much scoring from Kobe.

Kobe finally reached the 10,000-point mark late in the third quarter and the sell-out crowd showered him with applause. Knowing he’s 24 now, what’s the over-under on how many points he scores in his career?

I’d guess 10,032 if he keeps passing the ball as much as he did against the Pacers.

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THE PACERS fell behind by 17, and because it’s an NBA game you knew it would get close again. Kobe finished a creative dunk with a somersault roll and the fans came out of their seats. Who cares about the Clippers’ woes, the Spanos Goofs, the daughter who wants to spend the rest of her life watching Lifetime movies....

The Pacers tied it up at 91-91 with 2:45 to play, then went ahead by four before the Lakers came back to tie it. It was no longer a grueling week so much as a grueling game for the Lakers.

Six seconds to go, the score is tied, the Lakers have the ball. I’ve got a suggestion -- get the ball to Kobe. They do, he shoots -- it’s good.

Just what I needed.

But the ref is waving his hand and waving off the basket as if no one wants Kobe to score anymore, calling a non-shooting foul with two seconds to go and making the Lakers try again. They do, Shaq tips it to Robert Horry, he shoots, it’s good -- and just what I would have suggested.

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in e-mail from Margo Miller:

“I would greatly appreciate your assistance if you could ascertain from your sports editor why the Santa Anita entries were not included in The Times. I called this morning at 7:45 and I was informed I should wait until [later] when someone would be there to help. Do they keep bankers hours or what?”

As soon as the sports editor gets in this afternoon, I’ll let him know.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.