Made for Walking, but if You’re Small Enough, They Work for Spelunking

You can remove this one from your unsolved mysteries file. “The victim reported that her puppy was stolen from her apartment,” an officer wrote of a West L.A. woman in The Thin Blue Line, an LAPD publication. “One day after she filed the report, she found the puppy stuck in her knee-high boot.”

Pet adventures (cont.): The Coastline Daily Pilot said Laguna Beach police received a call that a resident “was torturing people with a large iguana.” No iguana victims were found.

Such a deal: Today’s questionable offers (see accompanying) include:

* A washing machine hose that seemed primed to explode (Bonnie Morris of Irvine)

* Some properties that are admittedly priced too high (Judy Farris of Rancho Mirage)

* And a Rancho Santa Margarita estate whose owner is willing to consider offers that are five times what it’s worth.

I beg your pardon! An L.A. worker noticed on an “evidence of insurability form” (see accompanying) that the company got pretty darn personal in the pregnancy section. (Apparently the request for additional information was inadvertently repeated from a previous question about medications.)

I’ll drink to that (maybe): To salute recently established companies in Long Beach, Mayor Beverly O’Neill sent out a press release announcing she was hosting a “New Business Reception ... Tuesday, Oct. 14 at the Water Treatment Plant.” Thus removing any doubt that Long Beach knows how to throw a party.

Mr. Bad Wrench: “Five cars and a group of people were reported on the corner of Kellogg Drive and Red Gum Lane” at 2:29 a.m., said the campus newspaper at Cal Poly Pomona.

“One person appeared to be unconscious as he hung out of a vehicle.” Further investigation revealed the individual “was just changing a flat tire and looking for a lost piece.”

Name game: To this column’s ever expanding list of colorful law firms, Greg White adds Swindle & Nunnery of Doniphan, Mo. And he notes that Swindle could very well have clients in a nearby town: Fairdealing, Mo.

miscelLAny: The Saddleback Valley News carried this Laguna Hills item: “Reported on the 24400 block of Christina at 8:40 a.m. on Oct. 4. Informant states that there is a naked male on the horse trail.”

I’m guessing it wasn’t a horse. Or an iguana.

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.