Party tricks
What advice do professional party planners have for the amateur host? To throw a party like a pro, say event planners Bryan Rabin and David Rodgers, whose client list ranges from the alternative rock band Coldplay to the establishment jeweler Cartier, start with your guest list.
“Whether it’s for six, 60 or 600, you really have to think about who you’re inviting,” says Rabin at the pair’s spacious Hollywood office. “If you choreograph the guest list right, at the very least, everyone will find someone else to talk to and someone else to talk about.” Rodgers adds, “You’re painting a picture. You’re just using people to do it--and think watercolors, not acrylic.”
Meaning that you want to invite people who will blend well, and it’s up to you to create that dynamic.
“People tend to separate into groups at parties, and you want to avoid that,” says Rabin, whose events have included a Sunday afternoon gathering at Gwen Stefani’s home honoring LeSportsac Chief Executive Timothy Schifter and W Magazine’s annual pre-Golden Globes bash, for which they erected a geodesic dome at the Pacific Design Center. “We don’t even do VIP rooms at our events to keep that from happening. We always invite people from a few worlds--music, art, film and fashion--even if the party is essentially geared toward one crowd.”
In addition to inviting a diverse group of friends, Rabin adds, “We always invite a Wild Card.”
“You always want to invite one or two people who are a little too sexy, for example. If it’s a too-sexy woman, the husbands get excited and the wives get a little nervous, but nine times out of 10, by the end of the evening the wives and the sexy woman are relating to each other, because the initial suspicion has motivated them to interact. That’s a good party dynamic.”
What you want to avoid, they say, are “Talkers” and “Takers.”
“A talker is someone who’s not watching another’s body language, and so you get this situation where one person is dominating a discussion, and the others are dying to get away, and when they spot their chance, they bolt, leaving this awkward void,” Rabin says.
“In other words, if you’ve got a friend who has a food issue, say, and they never stop talking about it, and they can’t go anywhere without making an issue of it, let them stay home where they will be comfortable,” Rodgers says with a laugh. “Same goes for takers,” says Rabin. “They’re the ones who expect to be waited on hand-and-foot, add nothing to the conversation and do nothing to make people feel comfortable.”
Let intuition be your guide, they advise. “If your instinct tells you a person would be a bad choice for an evening, follow it,” Rodgers says.
“If someone drinks too much, or is too lecherous, or something like that, I don’t care who’s campaigning to get them invited, our biggest mistakes have always been a result of not listening to our intuition,” Rabin says.
One inescapable facet of party-giving is the “drive-by,” which involves a guest or guests stopping by on their way to or from another gathering. “I’m not a big fan,” says Rabin. “That kind of thing can really fragment an evening unless the people doing it are people you feel will supply some fresh energy to the gathering.”
For those who show up and plan to stay put, go easy on the themes, they advise. “You can really have a lot of fun with themes in any party, but use a light hand,” says Rodgers. “It’s better to have people slowly realize how something--the food, the wine, the decor--relates to the evening than to hit them over the head with it. You want to give people a discovery process.”
For Oscar night, Rodgers suggests keying your food courses to the nominees, with sushi appetizers for “Lost In Translation” or a shoo-fly pie dessert for “Cold Mountain.”
For decorations, they also advise against getting too thematically distracted. “We live in Los Angeles, which means we can get great produce and great flowers all year round,” Rabin says. “Get lots of beautiful flowers and put them in vases, rather than doing these elaborate arrangements, which are just distracting. You’ve got great raw materials to begin with.”
Los Angeles is probably the only city in America where people place bets on Oscar contenders with Super Bowl gusto, which raises the question of Oscar betting.
“An Oscar pool at an Oscar-viewing party is like putting a dance floor and a mirrored ball at a regular party,” says Rabin. “It’s forced fun. The conversation becomes which guest is ahead, who’s behind, and really what people want to do is comment on the clothes and the speeches and the movies.”
“And you end up with winners and losers,” Rodgers says.
The pair recommends lighting as an easy fix. To enhance atmosphere and appearances, avoid recessed fluorescents and invest in as many candles as your space can accommodate.
“If you look across the room and someone else looks gorgeous, you know you look gorgeous,” explains Rabin. “You want people to feel sexy.”
For the main event, don’t worry if your TV isn’t of Jumbotron proportions. Just make sure it’s positioned so that all your guests have a good view. “We really keep the tech stuff to a minimum at our events; it’s really about the people,” says Rabin. If you need extra seating, they advise providing throws and silk pillows for the floor.
And, most important, whether you’re hosting or attending a party, watch what you say. “Don’t forget that some of the people you’re with have a good chance of having worked on one of the movies in contention, or may be attached to something or someone who did,” Rabin warns.
Which brings us to the subject of spirits. “Skip the cocktails,” Rodgers advises. “Stick to lighter stuff like white wine and champagne,” Rabin adds. “Oscar night is a long evening.”
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Resource Guide
Rabin Rodgers, Los Angeles, (323) 462-5410.
