Does This Editorial Look Fat?

Remember last year’s alarming national obesity study, the one saying fat was becoming the leading preventable killer of Americans, who were eating more and moving less? Well, after some working lunches, researchers at the Centers for Disease Control re-digested their numbers. And it seems their original fatality count was a bit overweight.

As a nation, we’re still fat -- very fat, actually. But the researchers now admit that instead of 1,096 Americans dying every day from excess fat, barely 1,000 do. That’s only 42 every hour. Or two people every three minutes. So, false alarm. Chow down! Eat up! Why skip snacks because CDC researchers can’t count? Welcome news as Super Bowl Sunday and Valentine’s Day approach.

In many ways, fat is too small a word for America’s bodily bulk. Don’t look down, of course. But sometime today, look around at others. Just don’t look as if you’re looking. And don’t gasp when you see an XXXL. Be honest: How likely are you to say anything about that person’s size? In his or her presence, that is.

That’s because fat may well be a leading cause of death in America, but it’s also a leading cause of whispers. Fat’s a delicate subject. We don’t have fat sizes; we have “women’s” and “big and tall,” and then something called “plus size,” which at least one youngster once misheard as “bus size.” Jeans are not made “tent-size” for overeaters, they’re just “roomier,” as if room-size pants weren’t large.

Fat Albert is fat. So is Jabba the Hutt. But we don’t have fat friends or relatives. They remain stout, large-boned, perhaps chunky or plump.

A current TV candy ad captures that family feeling. A woman asks her man if her very ample behind is fat. He takes one look and stuffs his mouth with a Twix bar to become unintelligible. She, in turn, hears what she wants and kisses him. Weight is a hard thing in an aging society that prizes slim but also not doing much to get there. Just as you pass through middle age en route to senior and have the time, money and sensibility to eat for fun and enjoyment, to make meals less of a fueling stop for a pack of frenzied family members, your body needs less food.

It’s not fair. But maybe over time if we instigate enough research recalculations, we can eventually produce a leaner result. Let’s munch to that.