So when are they lying? When their lips move

IF THE day comes when Nick Saban proclaims, “I’m telling you, there is no way Pete Carroll is going to leave USC for a job in the NFL,” Carroll’s gone.

As for the rest of you, every one of you out there who has ever gotten angry, annoyed or peeved at a reporter who doesn’t buy something a coach has to say, a simple “I’m sorry” will suffice. You certainly know the e-mail address.

It’s like breaking contracts today in sports, what’s the big deal if a player or coach lies -- but then if you’re in the business of writing down what people have to say, it only inspires more skepticism.

“I guess I have to say it,” Saban told the Miami media 10 days ago or so. “I’m not going to be the Alabama coach. I don’t know how many times I’ve got to respond to rumor and innuendo.... I don’t know why people keep asking me about it.”

I wonder how many Dolphins fans became irritated with the media for repeatedly asking about those Alabama reports. I can just imagine the rancor that had filled those Dolphins message boards and those who couldn’t understand why Saban’s possible departure was still a story.

NOW IT’S happening in San Diego. The Chargers have an open date this week, but the team made Coach Marty Schottenheimer available to the media.

It’s well-known in San Diego that Schottenheimer and General Manager A.J. Smith don’t get along, and around the NFL it has been a foregone conclusion that Schottenheimer will be fired.

A 14-2 record and No. 1 seeding in the AFC, though, would seem to complicate that -- if not change the Chargers’ approach to Schottenheimer. So given the chance, San Diego Union-Tribune columnist Tim Sullivan and a group of reporters asked how it was going now between coach and GM.

“We’re fine,” Schottenheimer replied.

But that apparently wasn’t enough for the columnist, who worked in Cincinnati and, after probably believing Pete Rose at the time when Rose told him he never gambled on baseball, he has learned.

According to Sullivan’s column, the media continued to badger Schottenheimer, prompting him to finally say, “I’ve answered the question.”

“No, you really haven’t,” a reporter protested, according to Sullivan’s column. “What is the physical evidence?”

Now I probably wouldn’t have asked for “physical evidence,” like a hug, kiss or copy of Christmas card exchanges, but I would’ve asked how much time the two are spending together.

“There doesn’t have to be physical evidence,” Schottenheimer said. “It’s not a physical thing, anyway.”

“What is it then?” he was asked, according to the San Diego columnist.

“I feel fine,” Schottenheimer said, and the next morning on San Diego radio station 1090, talented talk show hosts Scott Kaplan and Billy Ray Smith went after Sullivan for raising the issue and pestering the coach.

Although talented, they are also Chargers honks, and Kaplan and Smith couldn’t understand why such a thing would be a story at a time when the folks in San Diego were just loving their Chargers. They couldn’t understand why it was written, especially when the media could’ve been using the time to write more features about their Chargers heroes.

It’s a small town, and that’s how they think down there, but is there a more interesting story in the NFL than having a well-known coach -- hearing before the season begins that he’ll most likely be gone when it’s all over -- then sticking it to his bosses, going 14-2, and so now what happens to him?

At what point do you avoid muddying the waters, and just take someone’s word for it, “We’re fine?”

Should a reporter believe a school when it says there was just no place for Reggie Bush on the sideline, or when a coach says, “I mean, when does this [Alabama stuff] become a dead story?”

SO I’M talking to former baseball agent extraordinaire Dennis Gilbert, one of the founders of the Spirit of the Game Awards Dinner on Saturday at the Beverly Hilton Hotel benefiting pro baseball scouts, and he says Tom Lasorda gets to pick the winner of the Lasorda Award each year. And this year’s choice is Mike Scioscia.

So whom did Lasorda pick last year?

“Lasorda was last year’s winner,” Gilbert said, and Lasorda picking Lasorda to win the Lasorda Award made sense.

“No, no, last year was the first year for the award and so Tommy received it,” Gilbert said, “just like Willie Mays got the first Willie Mays Award.”

This year’s Lasorda Award will be presented to Scioscia by Angels owner Arte Moreno, giving those who buy tickets ($300 to $1,000 by calling 310-858-1935) the chance to pepper Moreno with questions about his light-hitting team.

Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig, Cal Ripken and the Brett family will also be honored at the star-packed event, which has raised more than $1.5 million for scouts and which also provides fans autograph and photo opportunities.

Just imagine the thrill of squeezing between Lasorda and Scioscia.

I WENT to my first Kings game Wednesday night, which is why I elected to write about Saban, Schottenheimer and lying coaches.

I GAVE it a try. I asked some folks before I arrived, and found someone who knew the name of the Kings’ coach, and tell me you know the guy’s name.

Then I met Marc Crawford. He was nice enough as coaches go, and I think I did a pretty good job of feigning interest in everything he had to say.

I also met Kings projected superstar Anze Kopitar, who is 19, which means the Kings probably only have three or four more losing seasons ahead of them before Kopita is old enough to really get everyone excited around here.

It’ll be tough, but I guess I’ll just have to wait.

T.J. Simers can be reached at

t.j.simers@latimes.com. To read previous columns by Simers, go to latimes.com/simers.