They might’ve thrown the book at him, but no rice

An L.A. County sheriff’s deputy came in for some kidding in the latest issue of the Star News, the department publication, over an incident at the Van Nuys Courthouse. After a defendant pleaded guilty in a hit-and-run case, the deputy handcuffed the man. “As the two men were walking across the courtroom, the defendant’s cellphone began to ring loudly,” the magazine said. “The song blasting out of the cellphone was ‘The Wedding March.’ ”

This was one time, however, when that song was not followed by a celebratory reception.

Low finance: Funny, Mary Fosselman of South Pasadena doesn’t recall giving the cashier a $100,000 bill when she went shopping recently (see accompanying). But I guess that’s the kind of thing that could slip anyone’s mind.

More wacky numbers: Columnist David Allen of the Inland Valley Daily Bulletin noticed an unusual sale at a Pasadena rug store that’s going out of business (see photo). “Call me cheap,” he added, “but I’m holding off until they get up to 82%.”

Word imperfect: A caption with a startling typo on a local TV newscast caught the eye of Fred Miller of Harbor City (see photo).

Now, just a minute: Eliana Alcouloumre, 11, assumes that the “gently used” classification for one charity event did not include diapers (see accompanying).

Bad timing award: A dad who stiffed a Northridge restaurant apparently didn’t notice all the temporary help on hand. Two dozen law enforcement types were working in the eatery for a Tip-a-Cop fundraiser for the Special Olympics.

Reserve LAPD Officer Eric Rose said: “As I began to clean the table after a gentleman and his two kids left ... I asked the waitress if the patron had left a tip for the Special Olympics. The waitress opened the bill on the table and found that the very nice man [had] left the restaurant without paying his nearly $100 bill.”

Rose mobilized the other officers, gave them a description of the man, “and we immediately searched the parking lot.” There, Rose said, they found the fugitive diner, who explained that he “just forgot to pay the bill.” He then settled up, left a “modest” tip for the waitress and “apologized profusely.”

miscelLAny: Baseball season is here and San Diego fans are delighted to have Hall of Fame broadcaster Jerry Coleman back at the mike. Even when Padres games are dull, Coleman keeps things interesting with his offbeat observations. In San Diego magazine, Tom Blair recalled the time a catcher was hit with a wild pitch. Said Coleman: “It hit him either in the groin or the toe.” Then the broadcaster added: “I think it was the toe because he’s limping.”