‘Empire’ recap: A minute-by-minute reaction of the premiere (in GIFs)
Without “Empire,” television hasn’t been the same. Thankfully, Cookie returned Wednesday night and Empire Entertainment still has plenty of drama to go around.
In the first episode of season two, there was a little too much drama. From an impassioned monologue about mass incarceration to Jamal’s resurrected relationship with Michael to the cameos of “Real Housewives of Atlanta” bestie and singer Miss Lawrence, DeRay Davis, Al Sharpton and Don Lemon, my body was not ready.
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But since there was so much going on, my recap this week reflects that. Below are my play-by-play reactions (in GIFs) as “The Devils Are Here” episode unfolded:
Spoilers ahead.
When the season one recap played ahead of the episode
https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/129350755995
At sight of a #FreeLucious rally and concert
https://summerbaby727.tumblr.com/post/111129230316
When the first line uttered of the season spoke to mass incarceration
https://gifsandmovies.tumblr.com/post/127110458887
Seeing Taraji’s full first outfit, complete with feathers
https://logotv.tumblr.com/post/85583381398
When Taraji, in a gorilla costume, descended from the sky and launched into a monologue on black people being treated like animals
https://diinadaring.com/post/129614960963
At Al Sharpton’s cameo
https://jacksonloner.tumblr.com/post/103071483267
At Andre Leon Talley (my father, in my head) and his shade toward Cookie’s last season Gucci outfit
https://somanygifs.tumblr.com/post/62449656196
When Porsha threw shade at Don Lemon’s coverage on CNN of the Ferguson protests, and Cookie countered with more shade about the anchor’s N-word segment
https://indieopium.tumblr.com/post/75256578333
Listening to the socially conscious song ‘Born to Lose,’ which features Sean Cross, Swizz Beatz, Jussie Smollett and Yazz
https://dilatar-de-las-pupilas.tumblr.com/post/57100972523
https://liketherulesoffeminism.tumblr.com/post/89457772311
Looking at Jamal with a beard
https://cas-get-the-salt.tumblr.com/post/127948465616
Seeing Lucious has a live feed of the concert in jail
https://scottielaw.tumblr.com/post/113779145909
At DeRay Davis as Cookie’s incarcerated cousin
https://pennylessproud.tumblr.com/post/87709265618
At Marisa Tomei, as Mimi Whiteman, the lesbian billionaire about to take over Empire, flirting with Cookie
https://gifs.tastefullyoffensive.com/post/118329392461
When there were closeups of the ripped bodies of Lucious’ jailed associates
https://realitytvgifs.tumblr.com/post/123683828211
Chris Rock as Lucious’ former drug-pushing boss Frank Gathers
https://realhousewivesofatlanta.tumblr.com/post/98649203680
When the episode gets really meta and Cookie shades rapper 50 Cent
https://lolgovernment.tumblr.com/post/68909105678
When Becky has fully stepped into her VP role and shuts down both Jamal and Hakeem
https://yoncehaunted.tumblr.com/post/125973302150
At Andre waking up in a cold sweat, shirtless, with a beard of his own
https://savagethalamus.tumblr.com/post/129569016210
And Rhonda starts to rub Andre’s sweat-soaked chest
https://josselynbardi.tumblr.com/post/121533324650
But then Chris Rock pops back on my screen
https://gifkeeper.tumblr.com/post/112257205010
When the Lyon clan (minus Jamal) throws Mimi a lesbian party
https://realitytvgifs.tumblr.com/post/126018830377
And Cookie debuts a new ponytail and bangs combo
https://waves-of-indecency.tumblr.com/post/76813375478
But Mimi gets flirty with Anika, and Hakeem gets jealous
https://bricesander.tumblr.com/post/98747014988
Meanwhile, Michael, Jamal’s initial boyfriend, is back in the picture
https://nachocake.tumblr.com/post/81377343936
Then Jamal and Michael kiss
https://emhooperau.tumblr.com/post/128273491414
But Jamal wasn’t satisfied and tugs at the back of Michael’s head to grab another, more titillating peck
https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/100665673040
Discovering that Jamal’s black boo from last season with the Australian accent is out of the picture
https://usedpimpa.tumblr.com/post/122358714921/new-giphy
When Anika starts to twerk at Mimi’s request
https://allreactions.tumblr.com/post/115244648702/woop-fist-pump-httpifttt1gmnnyg
When Lucious tries to rebut his prosecutor (Tyra Ferrell)
https://tonitamar.tumblr.com/post/123561299848
Realizing they don’t know Vernon is dead
https://theperfectgif.tumblr.com/post/26280169136
When Lucious calls the prosecutor ‘Miss Clarence Thomas’
https://yourreactiongifs.tumblr.com/post/124574486749
When I see Miss Lawrence perched on the piano singing a song by legendary performer Sylvester
https://nuttyzebra.tumblr.com/post/129726745756/new-trending-gif-tagged-glee-confused-jagged
https://oligodendroglioma.tumblr.com/post/125802825050/via-giphy
https://datgifarchive.tumblr.com/post/122889886283
His final note had me like:
https://jiferati.tumblr.com/post/88641138372
But then he threw shade at gospel artist Donnie McClurkin and Becky joined in
https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/80909624140
When Mimi jumped ships and was poached from the takeover plan, by Lucious himself
https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/91857431345
And Cookie tells Anika, ‘You can’t even dyke right’ after she slept with Mimi to seal the deal
https://gloominatrix.tumblr.com/post/101712981912/boom
Then Lucious Skyped into the board meeting
https://stop-this-pain.tumblr.com/post/74857424947
As Frank is eating, with blood spattered on his bib and gospel music playing in the background, then realizing that earlier in the epsiode Cookie compared him to Hannibal Lecter
https://mikhaex.tumblr.com/post/47251847881/patricio-ft-britney-spears
When Cookie opens the gift on her doorstep from Frank and it’s a dead man’s head
https://gifs-for-the-masses.tumblr.com/post/45316360584
When Lucious took up for Cookie in his one-on-one with Frank, even after learning she snitched Frank out to the feds
https://catwhiskersandpaws.tumblr.com/post/82979785774
When Frank thought he was going to kill Lucious, but Lucious had already paid off Frank’s jailhouse body guards
https://nesoxochi.tumblr.com/post/59509748517
Then an angry Jamal kicked the whole family out of ‘his father’s house’
https://catxshark.tumblr.com/post/59320780169
But Cookie slaps Jamal
https://heckyeahreactiongifs.tumblr.com/post/69733038083
And then a second time
https://the-man-in-the-mirror.tumblr.com/post/124118504981
But he still shut the door in her face
https://randar.com/post/82984300434/oh-no
And then he stormed off screen crying
https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/101078053710
Realizing it was over
https://cinematears.tumblr.com/post/122037728701
MORE:
The most exciting person on TV – Taraji P. Henson as Cookie – returns to claim her ‘Empire’
Jimmy Fallon spoofs ‘Empire’ on ‘The Tonight Show’ with ‘Jimpire’
‘Empire’s’ Gabourey Sidibe talks up Becky, ‘the smartest person in the room’
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