‘Empire’ recap: A minute-by-minute reaction of the premiere (in GIFs)

Without “Empire,” television hasn’t been the same. Thankfully, Cookie returned Wednesday night and Empire Entertainment still has plenty of drama to go around.

In the first episode of season two, there was a little too much drama. From an impassioned monologue about mass incarceration to Jamal’s resurrected relationship with Michael to the cameos of “Real Housewives of Atlanta” bestie and singer Miss Lawrence, DeRay Davis, Al Sharpton and Don Lemon, my body was not ready.

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But since there was so much going on, my recap this week reflects that. Below are my play-by-play reactions (in GIFs) as “The Devils Are Here” episode unfolded:

Spoilers ahead.

When the season one recap played ahead of the episode

https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/129350755995

At sight of a #FreeLucious rally and concert

https://summerbaby727.tumblr.com/post/111129230316

When the first line uttered of the season spoke to mass incarceration

https://gifsandmovies.tumblr.com/post/127110458887

Seeing Taraji’s full first outfit, complete with feathers

https://logotv.tumblr.com/post/85583381398

When Taraji, in a gorilla costume, descended from the sky and launched into a monologue on black people being treated like animals

https://diinadaring.com/post/129614960963

At Al Sharpton’s cameo

https://jacksonloner.tumblr.com/post/103071483267

At Andre Leon Talley (my father, in my head) and his shade toward Cookie’s last season Gucci outfit

https://somanygifs.tumblr.com/post/62449656196

When Porsha threw shade at Don Lemon’s coverage on CNN of the Ferguson protests, and Cookie countered with more shade about the anchor’s N-word segment

https://indieopium.tumblr.com/post/75256578333

Listening to the socially conscious song ‘Born to Lose,’ which features Sean Cross, Swizz Beatz, Jussie Smollett and Yazz

https://dilatar-de-las-pupilas.tumblr.com/post/57100972523

https://liketherulesoffeminism.tumblr.com/post/89457772311

Looking at Jamal with a beard

https://cas-get-the-salt.tumblr.com/post/127948465616

Seeing Lucious has a live feed of the concert in jail

https://scottielaw.tumblr.com/post/113779145909

At DeRay Davis as Cookie’s incarcerated cousin

https://pennylessproud.tumblr.com/post/87709265618

At Marisa Tomei, as Mimi Whiteman, the lesbian billionaire about to take over Empire, flirting with Cookie

https://gifs.tastefullyoffensive.com/post/118329392461

When there were closeups of the ripped bodies of Lucious’ jailed associates

https://realitytvgifs.tumblr.com/post/123683828211

Chris Rock as Lucious’ former drug-pushing boss Frank Gathers

https://realhousewivesofatlanta.tumblr.com/post/98649203680

When the episode gets really meta and Cookie shades rapper 50 Cent

https://lolgovernment.tumblr.com/post/68909105678

When Becky has fully stepped into her VP role and shuts down both Jamal and Hakeem

https://yoncehaunted.tumblr.com/post/125973302150

At Andre waking up in a cold sweat, shirtless, with a beard of his own

https://savagethalamus.tumblr.com/post/129569016210

And Rhonda starts to rub Andre’s sweat-soaked chest

https://josselynbardi.tumblr.com/post/121533324650

But then Chris Rock pops back on my screen

https://gifkeeper.tumblr.com/post/112257205010

When the Lyon clan (minus Jamal) throws Mimi a lesbian party

https://realitytvgifs.tumblr.com/post/126018830377

And Cookie debuts a new ponytail and bangs combo

https://waves-of-indecency.tumblr.com/post/76813375478

But Mimi gets flirty with Anika, and Hakeem gets jealous

https://bricesander.tumblr.com/post/98747014988

Meanwhile, Michael, Jamal’s initial boyfriend, is back in the picture

https://nachocake.tumblr.com/post/81377343936

Then Jamal and Michael kiss

https://emhooperau.tumblr.com/post/128273491414

But Jamal wasn’t satisfied and tugs at the back of Michael’s head to grab another, more titillating peck

https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/100665673040

Discovering that Jamal’s black boo from last season with the Australian accent is out of the picture

https://usedpimpa.tumblr.com/post/122358714921/new-giphy

When Anika starts to twerk at Mimi’s request

https://allreactions.tumblr.com/post/115244648702/woop-fist-pump-httpifttt1gmnnyg

When Lucious tries to rebut his prosecutor (Tyra Ferrell)

https://tonitamar.tumblr.com/post/123561299848

Realizing they don’t know Vernon is dead

https://theperfectgif.tumblr.com/post/26280169136

When Lucious calls the prosecutor ‘Miss Clarence Thomas’

https://yourreactiongifs.tumblr.com/post/124574486749

When I see Miss Lawrence perched on the piano singing a song by legendary performer Sylvester

https://nuttyzebra.tumblr.com/post/129726745756/new-trending-gif-tagged-glee-confused-jagged

https://oligodendroglioma.tumblr.com/post/125802825050/via-giphy

https://datgifarchive.tumblr.com/post/122889886283

His final note had me like:

https://jiferati.tumblr.com/post/88641138372

But then he threw shade at gospel artist Donnie McClurkin and Becky joined in

https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/80909624140

When Mimi jumped ships and was poached from the takeover plan, by Lucious himself

https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/91857431345

And Cookie tells Anika, ‘You can’t even dyke right’ after she slept with Mimi to seal the deal

https://gloominatrix.tumblr.com/post/101712981912/boom

Then Lucious Skyped into the board meeting

https://stop-this-pain.tumblr.com/post/74857424947

As Frank is eating, with blood spattered on his bib and gospel music playing in the background, then realizing that earlier in the epsiode Cookie compared him to Hannibal Lecter

https://mikhaex.tumblr.com/post/47251847881/patricio-ft-britney-spears

When Cookie opens the gift on her doorstep from Frank and it’s a dead man’s head

https://gifs-for-the-masses.tumblr.com/post/45316360584

When Lucious took up for Cookie in his one-on-one with Frank, even after learning she snitched Frank out to the feds

https://catwhiskersandpaws.tumblr.com/post/82979785774

When Frank thought he was going to kill Lucious, but Lucious had already paid off Frank’s jailhouse body guards

https://nesoxochi.tumblr.com/post/59509748517

Then an angry Jamal kicked the whole family out of ‘his father’s house’

https://catxshark.tumblr.com/post/59320780169

But Cookie slaps Jamal

https://heckyeahreactiongifs.tumblr.com/post/69733038083

And then a second time

https://the-man-in-the-mirror.tumblr.com/post/124118504981

But he still shut the door in her face

https://randar.com/post/82984300434/oh-no

And then he stormed off screen crying

https://fiercegifs.tumblr.com/post/101078053710

Realizing it was over

https://cinematears.tumblr.com/post/122037728701

MORE:

The most exciting person on TV – Taraji P. Henson as Cookie – returns to claim her ‘Empire’

Jimmy Fallon spoofs ‘Empire’ on ‘The Tonight Show’ with ‘Jimpire’

‘Empire’s’ Gabourey Sidibe talks up Becky, ‘the smartest person in the room’

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