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‘Scream Queens’ recap: The past returns to haunt Kappa

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Happy Chanel-O-Ween, pledges. That’s right, the almighty Chanel Oberlin (Emma Roberts) has managed to make one of the best holidays all about herself -- shocker, right?

The opening sequence of the “Scream Queens” episode “Haunted House,” which can only be described as the “Mean Girls’” Regina George montage meets “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition,” captures the full spirit of this holiday where Chanel sends gifts of fake severed limbs and razor apples to her Instagram followers all while insulting them.

After the oddly funny opening, things pick up right where last week’s episode ended -- with Wes (Oliver Hudson) and Gigi (Nasim Pedrad) accusing Dean Munsch (Jamie Lee Curtis) of being the Red Devil. However, their accusations are met with the harsh light of logic as Dean Munsch explains it would have been impossible for her to have gone downstairs to attack them and gone back upstairs in that short amount of time.

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While the cops are busy at the Kappa Kappa Tau house and dealing with the dismembered -- but apparently still alive -- Dickie Dollar Scholar, Grace (Skyler Samuels) and Pete (Diego Boneta) arrive at the only living (at least we think) member of the 1995 Kappa house who also was present the fateful night of the bathtub birth.

Under the guise of trick-or-treating the two show up as Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey from “How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days” -- Pete can do a mean McConaughey, even if he carries on it for a little too long -- the woman doesn’t buy their trick and immediately spills about that night in Kappa (a flashback scene that really brings out some comedy gold from Jamie Lee Curtis). She also reveals that the child was not a boy like they all believed, but actually a girl. This admission causes Grace, now convinced that the baby born in Kappa is her, to later confront her father who she suspects is the Red Devil trying to avenge the death of her mother.

All the while, Zayday (Keke Palmer) decides it is time to announce her candidacy for president of Kappa Kappa Tau, much to the surprise of Chanel and her minions. Chanel #3 (an always hilariously deadpan Billie Lourd) and Chanel #5 (Abigail Breslin) rush to comfort Chanel -- #5 apparently changing her tune after being completely against Chanel in last week’s episode -- and promise to help her stop Zayday from taking her place.

Zayday, determined to be Kappa president, decides to throw her haunted house party for charity -- really the only way you can prove you are a serious candidate these days -- at the house on Shady Lane. Pete and Denise Hemphill (Niecy Nash), however, show up to warn her against it as the house is really haunted and the subject of an urban legend, “The Hag of Shady Lane,” about a woman who used to wail over her dead children. The catch being that all of this went down in 1995 -- the same year as the Kappa bathtub baby.

Zayday is resolved to keep the haunted house there, despite the spooky story -- in fact, I think that helped solidify it as the perfect location. However, disaster strikes the night of the haunted house as all the dead bodies from prior episodes and the poor former Kappa that Pete and Grace met are laid out on display in the house. A horrified Zayday tries to get the police to come to the house, but before she can she is attacked and (presumably) kidnapped by the Red Devil.

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The biggest shock of the night, however, comes in the last few minutes of the episode. While Grace is explaining to Pete how she believes “The Hag of Shady Lane” was actually caring for the Kappa bathtub baby, the scene suddenly jumps back to 1995 to find Gigi on the porch of the Shady Lane house, dressed in all black. Looks like something traumatic did really happen to Gigi in the 1990s, but is it what we think it is?

So what did you think of the episode? What do you think Gigi has to do with the Red Devil killings,since she was targeted last week, after all? Do you miss Hester’s brace already too? Sound off in the comments and check back for what fresh hell next week’s episode brings!

Scream count: 8

Red Devil sightings: 3

Best quotes:

“Her dreams are as dead as she is, while mine still burn bright.” - Dean Munsch (Jamie Lee Curtis)

“Happy Halloween, Zayday. I hope you have a good time at your haunted party and get to murder lots of folks.” - Denise Hemphill (Niecy Nash)

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