Two Guys Lose Weight: The joys of the tapeworm diet
The following is a blog documenting two Los Angeles Times editors’ attempts to lose weight. It all began on Jan. 10.
Tony and I are entering Week Five of our weight-loss challenge. We’ve both dumped significant weight. I continue on Nutrisystem. Follow their directions (usually), use their app, work out at least three times per week, and I’ve lost 14 pounds in one month.
Tony continues on the “Tony Diet,” or as it was introduced four weeks ago, the “no discernible plan” diet. But he’s still had success. He’s lost 7 ½ pounds in those four weeks toward his eventual goal of dropping 20.
And he has a plan now. It’s the “Cookie Diet.” Seriously. He gets to eat six “special” cookies per day along with some vegetables and eight ounces of protein. It’s a real plan. To ‘celebrate’ going on the plan, however, he drank three beers. But since the celebration, he’s been loyal to it. And it’s working for him.
Hey, it’s better than the tapeworm diet. On this real diet, people actually ingest a tapeworm with the hope of it living in the stomach to eat some of the food. No joke.
The only problem with that? There could be minimal side effects. Los Angeles Times writer Amina Khan notes that “some tapeworm species can bring on not just weight loss, but also malnutrition, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, anemia, and the formation of fluid-filled cysts that can damage organs, block circulation, and cause seizures.”
Oh yeah, and the worms could grow up to 35 feet. And you could gain weight too.
But outside of the life-threatening aspects, a giant worm growing in your body, and the extra weight you’d gain, it sounds completely reasonable.
Let’s celebrate Tony’s new diet with the Cookie Monster, shall we? (video below)