The Times’ top 25 college football rankings

This could be a first in the history of Rankman — two teams in the top 25 with the nickname Aggies: Texas A&M; (11) and Utah State (24). Throw in Kansas State (8) if you count the nearby “Aggieville” bar scene. Missing the Aggies cut: North Carolina A&T;, New Mexico State, UC Davis. Our mythical national title game this week is Notre Dame vs. Ohio State, just to irritate Alabama fans who don’t know Ohio State is ineligible for postseason play. It’s the closest we may get to a nonconference Notre Dame vs. Big Ten Conference game as Notre Dame moves mostly to the Atlantic Coast Conference for football and Jim Delany’s Big 14 staff begins work on concocting goofy trophy names for fabricated rivalries such as Rutgers-Indiana and Maryland-Purdue.

1; Notre Dame 11-0; Restraining order against Sports Illustrated comes too late to keep Irish off of this week’s cover. (3)

2; Ohio State 11-0; Refuses to mention Big Ten rival Rutgers by name: It’s “that team from out East.” (4)

3; Alabama 10-1; Western Carolina believed to be only team to beat Mars Hill and lose to ‘Bama in same season. (5)

4; Oregon 10-1; NFL experts now think Kelly’s plodding 14-point offense better fit for ICL (Indoor Clydesdales League). (1)

5; Georgia 10-1; MRI reveals Uga pulled four hamstring muscles after Stanford upset Oregon. (6)

6; Florida State 10-1; Other computers that don’t have ‘Noles ranked in top 25 include Hal and Watson. (7)

7; Florida 10-1; If this team makes it to the title game, it’s time to replace Bowl Championship Series with rock, paper, scissors. (8)

8; Kansas State 10-1; NRA gun-fight roundup: winners at Norman/Morgantown but out-drawn in Texas by the Waco Kid. (2)

9; Louisiana State 9-2; Team will break from traditional Thanksgiving turkey and roast a Hog on Friday in Fayetteville. (9)

10; Stanford 9-2; Smartest school in football country two dumb plays from being 11-0 and No. 1 in BCS. (14)

11; Texas A&M; 9-2; Heisman bust of Johnny “Off Limits” Manziel will have piece of tape over mouth. (10)

12; Clemson 10-1; After last year’s Orange Bowl debacle, team asks to be removed from BCS bowl pool list. (11)

13; South Carolina 9-2; Spurrier says he admires all the Swinneys: Darvo, Dumbo, Dekembo, Dinko, Davo and Dabo. (12)

14; Oklahoma 8-2; Rankman has Sooners pegged to play “at-large” in Ken Burn’s new “PBS Dust Bowl.” (13)

15; Oregon State 8-2; BBBB (Better Beaver Business Bureau) notes Corvallis outscored Oregon’s offense by 48 points last week. (15)

16; UCLA 9-2; Stanford drum major prohibited from planting tree at midfield before Saturday’s game. (16)

17; Nebraska 9-2; Throw Big Ten records book out when Huskers play rivals Maryland and Rutgers ... wait, there are none. (17)

18; Louisville 9-1; Winner of Saturday’s game vs. Connecticut gets to announce it’s leaving the Big East first. (20)

19; Rutgers 9-1; Will be given Big Ten choice to join Leaders, Legends, or Lollygaggers Division. (21)

20; Texas 8-2; Mack Brown’s “How to cook a turducken” class canceled because of TCU game conflict. (22)

21; Michigan 8-3; Big Ten trophy for Michigan-Rutgers series will be named: “Little Brown Jimmy Hoffa Jug.” (23)

22; San Diego State 8-3; Adirondack spokesman confirms school committed to BIG Mountain EAST Conference. (24)

23; Kent State 10-1; News Flash: Golden Flashes on the golden cusp of winning first MAC title in 40 years. (25)

24; Utah State 9-2; Team is a great little gem of a story no average fan thinks, cares, or gives two hoots about. (NR)

25; Mississippi State 8-3; Rankman dragged the mighty Mississippi and pulled up this cowbell to ring at No. 25. (NR)

Dropped out: Louisiana Tech (18), USC (19).

Moved in: Utah State, Mississippi State.