Letters Home : Some Prominent Californians in Self-Exile Drop Us a Line From the Big Apple

They are Californians at heart but trying to get themselves into a New York state of mind. They moved East for a variety of reasons, some professional, some personal. Overall, they are absorbing what the Big Apple offers. But that may be easier to do under the assumption, which several of them share, that California is the place to which they’ll return.

Like other locals-turned-New Yorkers, they try hard to maintain ties to the West Coast. Some get back as often as possible for a needed blast of sun, space, quiet, and renewed relationships with family and friends.

Herewith, letters home to Los Angeles from a handful of well-known expatriates who are trying life on the other side of the country.

Kathleen Brown

The daughter of Edmund G. (Pat) Brown and the sister of Jerry Brown, Kathleen Brown became a public figure in her own right when she was elected to the Los Angeles school board. But her life has changed in the past five years, since moving East with her husband, CBS News President Van Gordon Sauter. She moved from a massive house in Hancock Park to an apartment (albeit a large one) on Park Avenue, settled her children in school and completed law school. She has just started work at the New York office of O’Melveny & Myers, a Los Angeles law firm.

“Dear Los Angeles:

“I saw much of the initial adjustment through my children’s eyes. They were immediately forced to interact with grown-ups. It’s part of living on the 12th floor and being dependent on an elevator and a doorman. My children had to be reintroduced to civilized behavior, since they had spent most of their time in California hanging out of trees.

“I started missing California my first April away, when the weather in New York turned nice. We knew we needed a retreat, so we found a home in Connecticut. Of course we added a hot tub. Here, we get in a car knowing that we’ll be in another state--and a most extraordinary rural environment--an hour later.

“Moving here was an opportunity for me to take my life in a new direction. Had I stayed in Los Angeles, I probably would have left the school board and sought higher public office. Running for office in California is like designer jeans--just find a style that has media appeal.

“Most of my friends here are not from New York. They’re immigrants who have come here, as I have, because of marriage or changed circumstances. I find it difficult to build friendships based on who you are, and that’s part of the scene here. People here don’t have time for newcomers, so they make fast connections based on who you are, whom you’re married to, whom you know. In California, there’s more openness to new people and new ideas. It’s funny. Many New Yorkers who have moved West think they’ve died and gone to heaven. Some Californians who have moved to New York just feel as though they’ve died.

“What do I miss? Streets that don’t have potholes. The sunset over the Pacific. Of course, I miss my parents and brother. And I miss the colors of life that are the cutting edge of culture, of thought, of entertainment. The New York style is more sophisticated, more traditional. You don’t see the joie de vivre you see just walking Melrose Avenue. There’s such a purpose here. In California, aimlessness has its own purpose.”

Peter and Ginny Ueberroth

Two days after the Summer Olympic Games in Los Angeles, Peter, who had served as president of the Los Angeles Olympic Organizing Committee, and Ginny Ueberroth packed their bags and moved to New York, where Ueberroth began his new job as commissioner of baseball. The couple live in a high-rise apartment not far from Ueberroth’s office on Park Avenue. But they maintain close ties to Los Angeles, traveling back often. “Dear Los Angeles:

Ginny: “For me, this experience has represented a kind of freedom. It’s the first time we’ve had no children living with us. I like being in an apartment. I like walking out, locking up and having nothing to worry about. It gives me a sense of freedom I never had before. We have no car and walk everywhere, and I love that.”

Peter: “There must be, within a short, 10-block walk of our apartment, 500 restaurants or takeout places, 300-400 of which are very good.”

Ginny: “Our social life has really adjusted. In California, things happened on the weekends; here, everyone leaves on the weekends. We don’t, so that leaves us alone.”

Peter: “I really miss the people of Los Angeles. Southern California has an exceptional quality in its people. Our friends were a real melting pot. We’re getting to know people in New York slowly; the pace here is so much faster and less tolerant. For me, it’s markedly lonelier.”

Ginny: “I like it that you can get lost in this city. After all the notoriety of the Olympics, I like it that we can roam the streets here. In Los Angeles we still can’t do it. We would have had to rearrange our lives there because of it, so this move did the rearranging for us.”

Peter: “I do walk the streets here pretty much unnoticed. That’s not to say that New York City is immune to real personalities. I went to lunch the other day with Henry Kissinger, and he has a recognition problem! We miss Los Angeles a great deal. People are ultimately what makes you happy--or not--wherever you are. We have those positive dynamics in Southern California. It’s just not easy here. I miss the beaches of Southern California. I even miss Gil Lindsay. And I really miss sports at the college level. But in a funny way, I feel less wear and tear here. To get on that San Diego Freeway and fight traffic for 45 minutes is a killer.”

Ginny: “We’re determined to be bicoastal; I think we’ll always want to keep some attachment to New York.”

Peter: “I guess the key question is, whom do I root for--the Dodgers or Mets? I say that depends on what city I’m in at the time.”

Connie Chung

Connie Chung spent seven years in Los Angeles as an anchor for KNXT-TV (now KCBS). Two years ago she moved to New York, where she hosts “NBC News at Sunrise” at 6:30, anchors that network’s Saturday newscast and is a regular contributor to its new magazine show, “American Almanac.” A year ago, in her apartment on the Upper West Side, she married longtime beau Maury Povich, who lives in Washington. The two have yet to live in the same city at the same time. “Dear Los Angeles:

“New York was as difficult to adapt to as Los Angeles was, though I didn’t expect it to be. I knew I didn’t know Los Angeles when I moved there, so I approached it differently. Yes, the pace was different from Washington, but once I understood it, I grew to love it. New York I thought I knew before moving here. I’d played here and done a lot of work here.

“But moving was a big shock. I didn’t know there would be so much hassle on a day-to-day basis. It doesn’t take long for me to get what a friend of mine calls a ‘tude’--like attitude, New York style. It’s not quite a bitchiness, but a crankiness, a short fuse.

“That aside, I feel like I fit in in both places and that, in fact, they’re more similar than different. New York and Los Angeles are the most contemporary cities. They are just different kinds of life. It’s a good life in Los Angeles, and in New York you suffer.

“I really feel like I’m a lot older and more worn out from New York. Time stood still for me those years in Los Angeles. I didn’t age, I had no wrinkles, no gray hairs. Maybe it’s the schedule more than the city, getting up at 3 a.m., traveling, split sleep. I’m basically a night person, so my L.A. schedule was great. Now I’m on dawn patrol, and I’ve never been able to get used to it.

“Professionally, Los Angeles was great for me. People didn’t do what I did at that time. It was considered strange to go from network to a local news operation in Los Angeles. But now that I’ve returned to network news, I carry the load for a small part of the network.

“I miss the peace and quiet of Los Angeles. I really missed my car and-- meshuggeneh-- I bought it back. That had to be California nostalgia.

“What else? I miss Jess (Marlow). He was my favorite partner ever, and I don’t work with anyone here who matches him. And I miss being mistaken for Tritia Toyota.

“I think of the East Coast as being the long-term place professionally, but I just asked Maury if he’d like to retire in the West. My ‘Sunrise’ years here, my sunset years there!”

Rhonda Martyn and Victor Palmieri

About two years ago, businessman Victor Palmieri, a longtime Californian, and his wife, dancer-choreographer Rhonda Martyn, moved to New York from San Francisco. Palmieri is a specialist in helping corporate giants (Penn Central was one client) out of financial difficulty. Martyn headed a dance troupe in San Francisco before moving East, where she has been called “one of the most literate and sophisticated choreographers around” by New York Times dance critic Jennifer Dunning. The couple has a cartoon on the wall that reads: “Living very New York but feeling very California.” “Dear Los Angeles:

Rhonda: As a dancer-choreographer, I don’t feel you have to be in New York, but there are advantages. There is greater quantity here, and everything international comes to New York. But there’s as much quality in California, just on a smaller scale. I miss the sense of space. I’m a West Coast dancer and was trained there. My roots are in that kind of expansiveness, that ability to cover space with your body and your mind. New York is that odd combination of being inbred and closed in . . . and hyper.”

Victor: “Major cities all have their own business personalities. In Washington, if you’re not in government or media, you’re more or less irrelevant. In Los Angeles, if you’re not in the entertainment industry, you can feel irrelevant. But New York is built around finance and money management and banking, and for my business--corporate crisis management--this city makes the most sense. I’ve also gotten involved with a number of things here important to me outside business. Lincoln Center’s Beaumont Theatre, the Council of Foreign Relations, the board of the Rockefeller Foundation. Do I love this city? I’d say this city and I are in a state of dynamic tension. At any given moment, it’s exhilarating, maddening, threatening. I’d never say I love it. It’s not that easy.”

Rhonda: “I would say I do. I like the fact it’s a love-hate relationship. I particularly like SoHo. For me, it’s the real city unmasked.”

Victor: “I think SoHo saved our marriage. I had found a place on the Upper East Side and was in a cab with Rhonda to show it to her.”

Rhonda: “Yes, and I broke out in tears saying ‘I can’t live on the East Side. I know I’m a SoHo person at heart.’ Now you can’t get us out of this end of town.”

Victor: “I really don’t miss much about California. We get out to our house in Big Sur pretty often and that’s renewing. I can see going back, but I can’t really visualize it.”

Jonathan Waxman

At 34, Jonathan Waxman is one of the hottest chef-restaurateurs in New York. He came to prominence in Los Angeles as chef at Michael’s, and he surprised many people three years ago when, instead of opening his own place in California, he packed his apron and moved. His first restaurant, Jams, is so popular--in large part because of its West Coast-style cooking--that in September he opened a second Manhattan restaurant, Buds. “Dear Los Angeles:

“I was associated so closely with Michael’s that I felt if I opened my own place in Los Angeles, comparisons would always come up. I wanted to go to virgin territory. The French restaurants had a stronghold on New York, but I felt people were ready for a change. And, to be honest, I also wanted to clear myself of the influences I felt in California, like Alice Waters and Wolfgang Puck.

“It’s really feast or famine here in terms of products. In the summer you’ve got so much stuff--like corn from 25 places. In the winter you can’t find a leaf of lettuce. But it does something good for you as a chef. It makes you adjust to the seasons.

“The clientele is different in the cities. Californians are so enthusiastic, it got to the point where you’d want to say, ‘Can you be a little more negative?’ New Yorkers are very skeptical. You have to prove yourself. L.A. people respect experimentation. New Yorkers feel, ‘Well, experiment out of town before you bring it here.’

“We opened Jams in January of ‘84, and, up to the time we opened, I didn’t think we’d make it. But I knew I didn’t want to go back to Los Angeles without doing what I’d set out to do.

“I miss the camaraderie among chefs in California. I’ve toyed with the idea of going back. I wouldn’t feel like I was going backward because I have learned so much.”

Michael Douglas

Actor-producer Michael Douglas, after 14 years in California, moved to New York about a year and a half ago. He has since starred in the film version of “A Chorus Line” and produced and starred in “Jewel of the Nile.” Douglas, his wife, Diandra, and 7-year-old son, Cameron, live in a large apartment with a view of Central Park. “Dear Los Angeles:

“I’ve never quite understood why it’s considered so phenomenal for a ‘Hollywood actor’ to move east. For me, I just blinked one day and realized I’d been in Los Angeles for 14 years and wanted a change.

“The entertainment industry in New York is much more absorbed, which I like. In Los Angeles, you tend to see the same people all the time in the six restaurants that are hot that week.

“In terms of my work, there’s more of a purity here in dealing with material, as opposed to all the packaging that goes on in Los Angeles. As an actor, there’s nothing like New York in terms of people-watching, because there is such a mixture on every block. In Los Angeles, I found that my routes were always the same, and it was rare to drift off them. In New York, you are constantly confronted by situations that may not be pleasant; in Los Angeles, if you encounter those situations at all, it’s while driving by.

“It’s not a question of Los Angeles catching up with New York. Rather than competing with each other, I wish we’d learn from each other. I wish the experimentation, frontier-like feeling of California would rub off a little on the more structured, classical Eastern feeling.

“I miss the rest of my family, but in a funny way, this is good for us. Living so close, sometimes you take each other for granted. Now, there’s more of an effort to communicate and share. But telephones and airplanes--man, they’ve brought us all a lot closer together.”