‘SAY YES’ DOESN’T SAY MUCH FOR ITSELF

Movies don’t get much worse than “Say Yes” (citywide), a limp updating of those old comedies in which people struggle against mounting odds to make a deadline in order to collect a fortune.

When eccentric tycoon Jonathan Winters dies, he skips over his smarmy son (Logan Ramsey, who looks older than Winters) in favor of his grandson (Art Hindle), a playboy and concert pianist who can collect the $250-million estate--provided that he marries within the next 24 hours.

Freshly arrived in New York from a ranch in the Southwest is a pretty, plain-spoken young woman (Lissa Layng) whom Hindle promptly meets in the cutest but antiquated Hollywood fashion. He and Layng do their best to win sympathy for this couple, who must sort out whether love or greed triggers their mutual attraction. But writer-director Larry Yust surrounds them with such stale, contrived situations that it becomes progressively depressing to watch “Say Yes” (rated PG-13, apparently for a glimpse of the heroine’s bosom).

Rumor has it that Winters’ part was inserted after the fact. True or not, his appearance in this film unfortunately brings to mind his role in “Oh Dad Poor Dad, Mama’s Hung You in the Closet and I’m Feeling So Sad,” which was greatly expanded in post-production in a desperate attempt to save that disaster. Winters is so special that it’s painful to watch him try to extract laughs from jokes about nuclear fallout. The mystery of how wretched little movies like this get made is surpassed only by the wonder at their being distributed and released.