For Chuck Nelson, a Lot Is Relative

The 341 residents of Storden, a southwestern Minnesota farming town, are all rooting for kicker Chuck Nelson, the former Ram, to stick with the Minnesota Vikings.

Why?

Nelson is the great-grandson of Danish farmer Andrew Patrick Nielsen, who emigrated to Storden about 100 years ago.

“I heard there were so many Nielsens in the village that we changed our name to Nelson,” the 26-year-old kicker said. “I still have some relatives there. At the passing scrimmage three weeks ago, one of the kids came up to me and said, ‘Hey, your grandfather’s my dad’s third uncle.’ ”

Just wait until all those relatives start hitting him up for tickets.

Point and counterpoint: Former Chicago Cubs reliever George Frazier said that criticism by broadcaster Harry Caray was the cause of his pitching problems.

Caray’s response? “George Frazier is the most inept pitcher I’ve ever seen.”

Golf’s-a-Strange-game Dept.: Curtis Strange did not leave the Firestone course in Akron, Ohio, with fond memories of the par-5, 625-yard 16th hole.

He carded a quintuple-bogey 10 there during the recent World Series of Golf. That’s right, a 10.

Strange, the 1982 World Series winner, pushed his tee shot on the 16th into trees on the right and needed two chips to get back onto the fairway.

Then he tried to reach the green with his fourth shot, but his ball plopped into an adjoining pond, and he took a one-stroke penalty.

The ensuing chip (shot No. 6) landed on the green--and rolled off into the lip of a bunker. Strange chipped his seventh shot over the green. He then chipped within 20 feet and two-putted for his 10.

“It was frustrating,” Strange said, understating as well as he had overstroked.

Water sports report: It’s a good thing that Wyoming basketball Coach Jim Brandenburg has good hands.

Brandenburg and seven others recently spent half an hour clinging to an overturned boat in the middle of Jackson Lake in Wyoming after the boat capsized.

“It was, I’d say, a mile and a half, two miles to any shore,” he said. “And with the current really taking us away from any shore where there would be help or warmth, we thought it would be a real difficult thing to swim it without hypothermia setting in. We thought it best to just stick with the boat.”

Their yells for help carried to a marina, where David Feezer, a lodge employee, heard them and rescued them.

Brandenburg says he still likes boating.

Surprise: Thomas Hearns is of the opinion that he, not Sugar Ray Leonard, should be the next opponent for middleweight boxing champion Marvelous Marvin Hagler.

“I don’t think Leonard deserves a fight,” Hearns said. “He hasn’t done anything in the last five years, and all of a sudden he steps in front of everybody.”

A fight between Leonard, who has twice retired since holding the undisputed welterweight title, and Hagler has been proposed for March.

“Ray Leonard is not preventing (Hearns) from fighting Hagler,” said Mike Trainer, Leonard’s attorney. “It’s Hagler. He doesn’t want to fight Hearns.”

Quotebook

Texas Rangers reliever Dale Mohorcic, explaining why his delivery varies between three-quarters and nearly submarine: “I get in a windup and make something up as I go along.”