Talk to Me, E.F.

I’m baffled. Is E.F. Hutton attempting to resurrect the faltering stock market by implementing some sort of Gregorian chant? Their most recent television commercial showing snippets of a busy metropolis set to the score of some medieval choral number makes no sense whatsoever.

The company whose slogan is “When E.F. Hutton talks, people listen” has made it increasingly difficult with their choice of indecipherable lyrics. I can only assume the choir is shouting out stock symbols of companies whose stock took a tumble in October in an effort to get them to miraculously rise. “SCulB, UBcoL, NerTZ. . . .”

This is the second and, hopefully, last advertiser who has adopted this questionable practice of having singers shout out nonsensical words. (Guess? clothing was first by playing a Tahitian war chant backwards.)

What does Hutton’s message mean? That due to the unpredictability and capriciousness of the stock market they have returned to sophistry for forecasting? That only divine intervention can save them? That their lyricist took a terrible loss in the market and is now getting even?

You’re speaking, E.F. Hutton, and I’m listening--but what are you saying?

JOHN E. JENSEN

Arcadia