Kareem: Relentless and Quick Drying

In a big brick hatbox near the shores of a great green lake, on a warm Sunday afternoon so clear you could almost see all the way to the end of the Laker dynasty, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and his teammates stood and delivered.

They didn’t pass a calculus test, like the kids in the “Stand and Deliver” movie, but the Lakers did pass a very vital test.

They fogged the mirror.

They put a blip on the heart-monitor screen. Yes, brothers and sisters, the Lakers live and breathe, and even run the fast break a little.

The corpse walks. The Laker dynasty didn’t drown in the Great Salt Lake.

Facing what was clearly their biggest crisis of the season, the Lakers beat the Utah Jazz, 113-100, in the Salt Palace to even the series at 2-2 and keep the Laker Decade alive for at least another week or so.

Speaking of being alive, Abdul-Jabbar responded to some vicious rumors that he wasn’t, as he played an effective and even imposing game. Amid whispers that he is a shell of his former self, Kareem was a hell of a shell, with 20 points and 11 rebounds, including a 6-rebound third quarter, when the Lakers came from 9 behind to 8 ahead.

If Kareem’s numbers are less than awe-inspiring, remember that this is the guy who in the previous two games was about as effective as a scarecrow in an air raid.

Sunday he was a major factor, probably the major factor, in the Lakers stayin’ alive. He took it to Mark Eaton, and the Lakers followed his lead.

“Obviously the death of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar was greatly exaggerated,” Utah Coach Frank Layden said. “He looked like an 18-year-old kid from New York out there.”

Actually he is a 41-year-old marvel/enigma from Bel-Air who looked so bad in games 2 and 3 of this series that even his mom was worried. She phoned him after Game 3 and asked him if he was ill.

Kareem must have replied, “Et tu, Ma?”

What could he tell her? “I’m not sick, Mom, I’m just old.”

Or, “If you’re going to ask questions like that, get a press pass.”

See, it’s been open season on Kareem over the past week. He has been shooting atrociously, rebounding weakly and intimidating nobody.

His age was mentioned once or twice in news stories and columns. Even one member of the Laker party spoke of the old guy’s legs being gone.

Who knew if it was old age? Nobody this old has ever played basketball at this level, so Kareem is a walking lab experiment. Game by game his performance, or lack of it, is scrutinized and evaluated by teammates, opponents, fans, the press, scientists, Russian spy planes. . . .

Sunday the consensus was that Kareem, to use an appropriately ancient cliche, came to play.

“He was a little more determined tonight to get his hook shot off, no matter what,” Jazz forward Thurl Bailey said. “It was like he wasn’t even thinking Mark (Eaton, Utah center) was going to be there, he (Kareem) was going to be relentless.”

Captain Skyhook took it to Eaton on the first play of the game, tossing in a hook. He hit several more over the 7-foot-4 Mt. Eaton. Kareem also had five offensive rebounds and came within one of his season high for total rebounds.

“I just think he went for it,” Magic Johnson said. “He was aggressive. He was not letting himself get bumped out of his range.

“He was shooting. He had that fire . That fire !”

In a guy Kareem’s age, that fire can often be heartburn. Sunday it was more.

“He seemed a little more focused,” Laker Coach Pat Riley said. “And he was stronger in his post moves. His concentration was a hell of a lot better.”

What was Kareem’s opinion of his performance? I don’t know, because he left the Salt Palace early to beat the traffic. He hustled out of the arena approximately two minutes after the final buzzer, a proud graduate of the Evelyn Wood School of Speedshowering.

Maybe Kareem wanted to make sure he got a good seat on the Lakers’ flight home. He’d been getting good position all day and figured he was on a roll.

Maybe he didn’t feel like talking anymore about how old or young or alive or dead he is or was or will be.

Maybe Kareem was simply tired of looking at Mailman Malone’s face. Fans entering the Salt Palace Sunday were given Mailman Malone masks attached to sticks, so they could look exactly like their favorite power forward. Never before have there been so many black faces in the stands at the Salt Palace.

During the National Anthem, one matronly woman stood courtside, holding the Mailman reverently over her heart. Another woman tied two Mailmen over the front of her blouse, like a bikini top.

By the fourth quarter, when the Lakers turned up the heat, the fans were using the Mailman’s face to fan themselves off.

The Mailman is one of the NBA’s great new faces. Kareem’s visage is as old as Mt. Rushmore.

Is it time for the kids to take over? Do the Lakers have one more game in them, one more series, one more championship?

A lot of it will depend on Kareem, and if you’re looking for signs, the old legs looked spry Sunday when he dashed out of the Salt Palace.