A Record Rose May Not Like

Nat King Cole might not recognize the lyrics, but he’d certainly be familiar with the tune. Writer, producer and performer Mark Bradford chose Cole’s “Ramblin’ Rose” as the basis for his hit parody, which--repeating the chorus where appropriate--goes like this:

Gamblin’ Rose, gamblin’ Rose

Why you gamble, no one knows.

You’ve got bets down,

All around town;

What a letdown,

You gamblin’ Rose.

Where’s you’re bat?

Where’s your car?

Did you lose them

In some bar?

Charlie Hustle’s

Days are numbered

And his odds are

Long and far.

Marge Schott says:

“Just play ball.”

Ueberroth just

Hit the wall

For your fans’ sake,

With a good break,

Baseball can’t take

A gamblin’ Rose.

Yes, it is true: Jim Healy plans to air the tune this evening at 5:30 on KMPC.

Gold medals don’t count: Moses Malone, center for the Atlanta Hawks, has never hidden his avaricious nature. He is one of the few players to skip college and become a professional out of high school.

It was not surprising, therefore, that Malone was among the 58% of National Basketball Assn. players in an Associated Press poll who said they would not want to play in the Olympic Games.

“They ain’t paying,” Malone said. “My free time is over. I gave that on the sandlot. It’s a waste of time.”

Not that Malone will be missed. He’ll be 37 by the 1992 Barcelona Games.

Foreign powers: Scotland’s Sandy Lyle won the Masters in 1988 and, by winning this year’s Masters Sunday, England’s Nick Faldo continued a trend.

In the past 10 years, golfers from outside the United States have won more than a third of the game’s four major championships--the Masters, the U.S. Open, the British Open and the PGA Championship.

Take away the PGA Championship, and foreign players have won almost half the majors in the past decade, including six Masters and six British Opens.

Wait a minute: From the Associated Press story on Jim Abbott’s Angel debut:

“Abbott, born without a right hand, did not have any trouble fielding. No balls were hit to him . . . “

A sting in the tale: The Charlotte Hornets’ initial season in the NBA has been one of those good news-bad news situations.

On the court, it has been dismal. The Hornets are 17-58 and have lost nine games in a succession.

Even so, Charlotte has sold out its 23,388-seat arena for all but five of its first 38 home games, and the Hornets will become the first major league franchise in any sport to lead its league in attendance in its first season.

Quotebook: Said comedian Jan Murray, who flew to San Francisco to attend a roast of the Oakland Athletics’ Jose Canseco in benefit of the City of Hope National Medical Center: “I can’t believe I came here to honor a man who went one for 17 in the World Series.”