An Extra Second Was Just Enough for Paper Tigers

The Colleges Suddenly, Losing State University--LSU to its brave followers--is making a stumble for the Bottom Ten title.

The Paper Tigers (1-3) lost the hard way Saturday, in overtime. College games aren’t supposed to go into overtime--the players complain they’re underpaid as it is--but when time ran out with the score tied, the clock was set back to one second to allow Florida to kick a winning field goal.

Meanwhile, the next Rout of the Week victim is Saturday’s USC-Cal game. Television officials so far have jerked the starting time from 1 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. to 3:30 p.m. The day hasn’t been changed, yet.

THE RANKINGS

Team, Record Last Loss Next Loss 1. LSU (1-3) 13-16, Fla. Auburn 2. Toronto (1-4) 3-4, Oakland Idle 3. Chicago (1-4) 2-3, Giants Idle 4. Washington (2-3) 16-24, USC Oregon 5. Syracuse (2-2) 10-41, Fla. St. Penn St 6. Michigan (3-1)* Def. Wisconsin, 24-0 Michigan St 7. W. Va. (4-1-1) 10-12, Va. Tech Idle 8. Texas (2-2) Def. Rice, 31-30 Oklahoma 9. Penn. St. (4-1)** Def. Rutgers, 17-0 Syracuse 10. Cosby (0-1)*** 3-27, Pitt B.C.

11.-13. Mildcats (Arizona, Kansas State, Kentucky) (6-8); 14. Notre Dame (outgained by Stanford, 316 yards to 296); 15. ABC (didn’t televise Notre Dame’s 27-17 win over Stanford because network thought the score wouldn’t be close); 16.-17. Combined televised victories of Houston and Oklahoma (0); 18. Ohio State (2-2); 19. Idle; 20. Virginia (0-29--in last 29 games against Clemson).

*Michigan Coach Bo Schembechler : “That was the worst 24-point victory we’ve ever had.”

**Penn State had same record at this time last season--and wound up 5-6.

***Bill Cosby gave inspirational speech to Temple before 3-27 loss to Pitt.

ROUT OF THE WEEK: Television vs. USC-Cal.

COMEDOWN OF THE WEEK: West Virginia, a 16-point favorite, lost by two to Virginia Tech. Runner-up: Texas, a 14-point favorite, edged Rice by one.

Cable Fibs

Worst excuses offered by cable viewers who phoned the ABC affiliate in Elkhart, Ind., trying to get the satellite coordinates of the blacked-out Notre Dame-Stanford game:

1. “This is Roone Arledge. My secretary misplaced the coordinates.”

2. “I have a heart condition and if I don’t see the game it could put me in cardiac arrest.”

3. “I’m from the Armed Forces Network. The Department of Defense gave us the coordinates. But they make a lot of mistakes. I’d like to double-check them with you.”

The Pros

That crunching you heard over the weekend was the sound of a couple of NFL notables eating their words.

First, there was the New York Giants’ Phil Simms, quoted in a Philadelphia paper last week as saying that a good high school quarterback with proper protection could throw for 300 yards against the Eagles’ defense. He was promptly sacked four times in a 19-21 loss to Philadelphia.

Then there was the Chicago Bears’ Mike Ditka, who said of the performance of Tampa Bay’s Vinny Testaverde against Minnesota: “Someone said it looked like he was color-blind and the color was green because he kept throwing the ball into the carpet.” Testaverde, seeing red, picked the Bears apart for 22 completions and three touchdowns.

Testaverde’s strong performance removed him from contention for the Bottom Ten’s Least Valuable Player Award. The winner, incidentally, will be handed the keys to a 1987 Yugo in January by last year’s LVP, Brian Bosworth.

THE RANKINGS AFC WEST

Team, Record Last Loss Next Loss 1. Seattle (2-3) 16-20, Kansas City San Diego 2. San Diego (2-3) 10-16, Denver Seattle 3. Kansas City (2-3) Def. Seattle, 20-16 Raiders 4. Raiders (2-3) Def. Jets, 14-7 K.C.

AMERICA’S TURKEY

Team, Record Last Loss Next Loss 1. Dallas (0-5) 13-31, Green Bay S.F.

QB FOR A DAY

Team, Record Last Loss Next Loss 1. Detroit (0-5) 17-24, Minnesota Tampa

TRUMP CONFERENCE

Team, Record Last Loss Next Loss 1. N.J. Jets (1-4) 7-14, Raiders N.O.

BAY CONFERENCE Drained of teams

ENOUGH, ALREADY AWARD: NBC’s Bill Walsh, in his comments about the pass-rushing technique of Buffalo’s Bruce Smith Sunday, set an NFL record for Most Times Repeating the Same Criticism of the Same Player in One Quarter (5). (He can’t hear you down on the field, Bill.)