HYPE ATTACK:

Our Jose Canseco 900 Rip-Off Award goes to David Bowie, who recently announced a 1990 “Retrospective” World Tour, which kicks off March 3 in Quebec and (surely by coincidence) coincides with the release of his digitally remastered catalogue of albums. The gimmick: Each concert will be an all-request affair, with Bowie performing songs chosen by his fans. Of course, to vote your favorites, you have to dial a 900 number (that’s $2 for the first minute, kids, $1.50 for each additional minute), which leisurely touts various contests and prizes aimed at keeping fans on the line for as long as possible. . . . Rap hotshot M.C. Hammer’s new album, “Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em,” is due later this month from Capitol Records. It features rap-style covers of the Jacksons’ “Dancing Machine” and the Chi-Lites’ “Have You Seen Her,” plus a song called “U Can’t Touch This” that borrows heavily from the main riff of Rick James’ “Super Freak.” Hammer’s new single, “Help the Children,” also incorporates parts of Marvin Gaye’s “Mercy Mercy Me.”