He Was in Different Time Zone, Not to Mention Another World

When a couple of St. Louis Cardinal players failed to arrive on time in spring training, Manager Whitey Herzog was reminded of a story.

He told Thomas Boswell of the Washington Post that when he was playing for the Washington Senators, Manager Charlie Dressen called up a pitcher named Carlos Paula from the minors in Denver.

“Charlie called him up on a Thursday,” Herzog said. “On Friday, no Paula. On Saturday, still no Paula. We got a doubleheader on Sunday. No Paula. We’re dressing after the second game and here comes Paula through the door.

“Dressen saw him and got so mad his ears looked like they were going to fly away. He hollers, ‘Carlos, where the hell have you been?’

“Carlos says, ‘Charlie, in Denver there’s two hours’ difference in time.’ ”

Signals over: When the Buffalo Bills announced the signing of quarterback Jim Kelly to a seven-year, $20-million contract, he said, “I hope nobody expects me to go out and throw 40 touchdowns a year.”

Interjected General Manager Bill Polian: “A game .”

Ouch: From Mike Hlas of the Cedar Rapids Gazette: “Los Angeles has poor air quality, terrible traffic problems and insecticide all over the city that is supposed to kill fruit flies. On the plus side, it no longer has Al Davis.”

Wait a minute: Said Darryl Strawberry of the New York Mets after Frank Viola and John Franco combined on a shutout Wednesday: “That is what we’ve been waiting for all year.”

That’s all of 48 hours.

Trivia time: What do Angel announcers Joe Garagiola and Joe Torre have in common?

Piece of cake: Jerry Tarkanian, asked about recruiting after his Runnin’ Rebels ran off with the NCAA title, told the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette: “What’s so tough about recruiting? I’ll be in Pittsburgh Friday night for the Dapper Dan game. I’ll watch the kids play, go have a steak and some beers with my friends afterward, stay in a nice hotel. Then, I’ll go back to Vegas and tell my alumni how tough recruiting is.”

Sorry, Jack: Jack Nicklaus says his goal is to become the first golfer to win tournaments on the regular tour and the senior tour the same year. Ed Coleman, teaching pro at Rancho Park, points out that it has already been done.

In 1965, Sam Snead won the Greensboro Open and the PGA Seniors. He was 53. He won the PGA Seniors five times, the last time when he was 61.

Add forgettable quotes: On April 2, Seattle Manager Jim Lefebvre said of Tom Niedenfuer: “He really has impressed all of us. He has changed his style, mixing up his pitches, changing location. He’s been a real pleasant camp surprise.”

A week later he was cut.

Trivia answer: They were both catchers for the St. Louis Cardinals.

Quotebook: Pittsburgh outfielder Andy Van Slyke, begging off when asked his spring training batting average: “They don’t put spring training statistics on bubble-gum cards.”