TV Reviews : George Burns’ 95th Birthday Is No Party

Many, many years ago, when we were all very, very young, the concept of variety special had a unique grandeur. But it fell into that great, voracious maw that is television. Instead of grandeur, the term began to mean celebrity roasts and toasts and awards programs and other bloated shows intended to fill up network time and space.

There is an example of this diminished form for an hour tonight at 10 on CBS and, as unfortunateness would have it, it’s “George Burns’ 95th Birthday Party.”

Of course, outside of a few selected deities, there is probably no more beloved person in this whole galaxy than Burns (who also has played one of those deities, by the way). He would be a joy for an hour or two or three or, come to think of it, 95 years.

But this underdone variety special is compacted with painfully thin gags and artists who may be talented stars in their own right but who, as far as can be ascertained, have nothing to do with the birthday boy other than availability for this evening.

Well, at any rate, we get a little bit of Burns at the end--not nearly enough--and he promises never to retire: “I’m going to stay in show business until I’m the last one left. . . . I lived a very exciting life and I expect the second half to be just as exciting.”