A West Hollywood bookstore is serving up...

A West Hollywood bookstore is serving up an unforgettable Valentine’s Day experience Thursday--an appearance by performance artist/author Karen Finley. We suggest you wear galoshes.

A principal in the controversy over government financing of obscene artists, Finley is known for her foulmouthed monologues as well as for smearing her body with foods to symbolize the mistreatment of women.

Her appearance, aptly enough, is at Book Soup.

A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and several books on how to meet thou: While we’re in our Valentine’s Day mode, we’re happy to report that the promoters of a “Finding the Right Mate” seminar in Pasadena promise:

“Don’t worry! You won’t go home from the seminar empty-handed.”

Before you depart, they add, you will be united with “seminar summary materials” as well as “a list of books recommended for additional information.”

Completing this lovers’ triangle of items, we report that when the State Bar announced it would consider a proposal to adopt rules forbidding attorneys from having sex with clients, Britain’s The Economist quipped:

“The ban, the first of its kind, would affect 120,000 California lawyers--and cause havoc for the scriptwriters of ‘L.A. Law.’ ”

No need for the show to relocate as “N.Y. Law.” The lawyers gave the ban the brushoff.

In L.A., where history so often is leveled by the wrecking ball, you can find restaurants and other businesses proudly displaying claims of landmark status, such as: “Since 1975.”

A church on Manchester Boulevard (see photo) surpasses all the locals in this category.

List of the Day:

Here’s a kind of good news/bad news report from the L.A. County Natural History Museum. The museum says the chances of an individual being killed by a shark this year are considerably less than those of being eaten by the Internal Revenue Service.

Here are the odds of:

1--Being killed by a shark: 1 in 300 million.

2--Dying from a bee sting: 1 in 5.5 million.

3--Being killed by lightning: 1 in 1.9 million

4--Being killed by tornado: 1 in 450,000.

5--Having a tax audit: 1 in 66.

miscelLAny:

M&B; Enterprises, which manufactures mini-blinds and other window items in a building beneath the Santa Monica Freeway, is one of a handful of companies whose ceiling is a roadbed.