Hey! Who Moved the Escalators?


NO, YOU'RE NOT HALLUCINATING, IT'S A DIFFERENT MALL: Fans of L.A.'s Beverly Center should get a sense of deja vu while watching "Scenes From a Mall," the new Paul Mazursky film about a couple, played by Woody Allen and Bette Midler, whose marriage unravels as they shop.

The only problem is the exterior mall scenes were shot at the real Bev Cen, but the interiors were filmed on sound stages and at the Stamford Town Center in Stamford, Conn. Both malls were built by the Michigan-based Taubman Company, which explains the similarities in their layouts.

We wish we had known that before we saw the movie; it was confusing trying to figure out why some areas looked like the Beverly Center, yet the escalators were in the wrong places.

Luckily, a friend later reassured us that we were indeed watching a Mazursky--not a Fellini--movie. She explained how the film was shot, then added, "Oh, you were just hoping that there was some undiscovered floor of the Beverly Center."

Well . . . yeah.

DEAR HOT: I love wearing my boy-friend's shirts and jeans--they remind me of him. And while I'm not into cutesy, his-and-her outfits, I'd like to wear something for women that's similar to what he's wearing for men. Am I making any sense?

DEAR HOT SHOPPER: Sort of. You might be interested in the latest marketing brainstorm from Nicole Miller, the New York designer known for women's dresses and scarves and men's silk ties featuring whimsical, colorful drawings of candy boxes and cocktail glasses. Now she's got matching women's lace-trimmed panties and men's ties (pictured) made of the same silk prints. The panties and neckties are sold in the menswear department (to make life easier for men who hate lingerie departments) at I. Magnin. The silk Jacquard ties are $60; the washable silk panties are $35.

POCKET PROPHYLACTICS: Last year saw the marketing of condom earrings. Now, the Midwest AIDS Prevention Project is selling SAFE SOX, hosiery that has a little pocket just above the ankle to hold a condom. Or keys, money, credit cards. Also known as "Sockaroo, the Sock with a Pocket," SAFE SOX sell for $6, complete with condom, and are available in a variety of styles, sizes and colors by calling (800) MAPP-SOX.

We have nothing against using socks to carry condoms. But we prefer to use pocket socks to tote cash, a credit card and driver's license on shopping marathons so we don't have to lug our purses. Plus, our hands are free to fiddle with merchandise or pick up hanger burn (you know, that ugly skin disorder that results from lugging way too many garments to the dressing room).

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