Hello, room service? Could you send up...

Hello, room service? Could you send up 2,600 burgers?A Palm Springs resort sent a letter to “Library, 3501 N. Broadway, Los Angeles,” which is the address for Lincoln High.

“Enjoy a four-day vacation in the Palm Springs area,” began the computerized blurb from Lawrence Welk’s Desert Oasis Resort. “If you prefer peace and quiet, there is no better place than the desert. . . . Kids? Bring them along, of course.”

Responds Maggie Crumrine, the school librarian: “Kids? We have 2,600 of them here at Lincoln. Are the hotel people ready for us?”

Stupid Criminal Tricks (Cont.): “Happiness Is Being a Grandparent,” said the license plate frame on a Chevrolet spotted by Long Beach Sgt. Steve Filippini. Odd thing was that the passengers were six youths--between the ages of 13 and 17, as it turned out. After pulling over the sixsome, Filippini discovered that the car had been stolen.

Simpler times: In pre-air conditioning days, one of L.A.’s pitches to Easterners was that the nights here were never hot and muggy.

For example, Jim Chermak of West L.A. came across a 1947 magazine ad that detailed the summer advantages of Southern California, including the opportunity to “sleep under blankets.”

One liberal who gave the government a handout: Barbara Woodfill of Santa Monica photographed the sign above--before the election.

Well, they got the initials right: A sales catalogue for Superior Galleries of Beverly Hills recently listed a document written by Martin Luther King Jr. for a speech he made at a “SC Lutheran College” retreat. Make that Southern Christian Leadership Conference retreat, Superior.

All ears: Disney boss Michael Eisner, attending the dedication of a learning center that his company co-sponsored, was approached by Tiffany Coley, an L.A. resident. She invited him to her Nov. 28 birthday party.

Eisner smiled and told her he was sorry but would be out of town with his family that day. Still, we suspect the boss noted that someone as resourceful as Miss Coley might one day be executive material. After all, she’s only 9.

No doubt Tiffany picked out Eisner at the festive event at the Ujima Village Apartments because, as you can see from our photo, he was the man in the Mickey Mouse ears.

MiscelLAny:

If candidates for mayor of L.A. continue to pop up at the same rate they have since Councilman Mike Woo’s declaration in August, there will be 16 on the April primary ballot, give or take a couple.