He Takes It With a Grain of Salt--From His Wound

Joe Theismann says it’s nothing personal, but early morning listeners of his radio show are getting an earful of his lambasting of Washington Redskin quarterback Mark Rypien.

Some excerpts from Theismann, a former Redskin quarterback:

--”Mark Rypien is lucky he’s making $3 million, or else he’d probably be taking the same place Randall Cunningham took (recently benched).

--”The Washington Redskins have been inept on offense, and it falls on the shoulders of the quarterback. . . . What you’re seeing is a guy who’s afraid to make a mistake.”

Rypien’s response: “I don’t care what he says. Joe is Joe, we all know Joe.”

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Trivia time: What is UCLA’s record against USC when the annual game has been played in the Rose Bowl?

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Vaulted ceiling: Earle Meadows, the former USC pole vaulter who died recently in Ft. Worth, shared the world record with teammate Bill Sefton in 1937.

Each cleared 14 feet 11 inches in the Pacific Coast Conference meet at the Coliseum that year. They would have gone on to a higher height--perhaps breaking the 15-foot barrier--but the vaulting standards weren’t equipped to go any higher.

At the time, Meadows and Sefton were nicknamed “The Heavenly Twins.”

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Now we know: Sergei Bubka, the world record-holder in the pole vault, explaining why he didn’t clear a height in the Summer Games in Barcelona:

“Ten days after the Olympics, my manager checked information on my biorhythms for August 7, the day of the pole vault final. He found that intellectually, psychologically and physically, I was at the lowest point possible.”

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Try again: San Francisco Chronicle columnist Lowell Cohn’s pre-fight analysis of the Evander Holyfield-Riddick Bowe championship bout:

“Don’t expect fireworks, just a workmanlike, 12-round decision for the champion (Holyfield). The man with the superior character usually wins.”

Sure, and that explains why former heavyweight champion Mike Tyson usually won.

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Makes sense: If players could vote for the Heisman Trophy, Miami quarterback Gino Torretta knows who would get his vote:

“I would vote for myself. What do you think, I’m stupid? That’d be like asking one of the presidential nominees who they voted for.”

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Option block: Atlanta Hawk forward Dominique Wilkins was delighted to see Rumeal Robinson traded to New Jersey for Mookie Blaylock.

“Rumeal is his own first option,” Wilkins said. “A point guard should always see himself as a second, or third option.”

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Dinosaurs? “Everyone has this mystique thing about USC, but we’re creating our own mystique,” Stanford linebacker Tommy Williams told Mark Soltau of the San Francisco Examiner after the Cardinal beat the Trojans. “USC is still living in the past.”

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Trivia answer: The Bruins have won three of the five games.

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Quotebook: New Orleans Saint Coach Jim Mora on singer Elton John, whom he saw in concert recently: “I didn’t realize he sang all those songs.”